This coming Thursday (December 10th), I'm going to go by Borderlands Books to sign anything that is waiting for me to sign it (and that has been paid for, in the case of something that needs to be personalized; I cannot stress enough how important it is to actually pay for things). While I can't guarantee that anything ordered as a holiday gift will get to you before the holidays, I can't say it's impossible, either. So! Do you want to give a signed, personalized book to the person of your choice, after exchanging money for it? Here's how!
1. Contact Borderlands Books (http://borderlands-books.com/) in San Francisco, California. You can contact them by either email or phone; check the website for specific options.
2. Order books! You have to tell them which ones, naturally, and whether you want them signed and personalized, or just signed. Personalized books must be paid for up-front. You can request a specific inscription. Some inscriptions (ie, my phone number) will be refused, although your book will still be signed.
3. While you're at it, order anything else that you'd like to get. I mean, hello, bookstore, and you're already paying for shipping, so why the heck not? May I recommend The Girl With All the Gifts, by M.K. Carey? Or Libromancer, by Jim Hines? Or The Hum and the Shiver, by Alex Bledsoe?
4. Give the store any information they need, like shipping address and billing and stuff.
5. The store will contact me, and I'll go in and sign things!
But wait, you cry! What books are currently available?
TOBY: Rosemary and Rue, A Local Habitation, An Artificial Night, Late Eclipses, One Salt Sea, Ashes of Honor, Chimes at Midnight, The Winter Long, and A Red-Rose Chain.
INCRYPTID: Discount Armageddon, Midnight Blue-Light Special, Half-Off Ragnarok, and Pocket Apocalypse.
NEWSFLESH: Feed, Deadline, Blackout, the Newsflesh box set, and When Will You Rise.
PARASITE: Parasite, Symbiont, and Chimera.
VELVETEEN: Velveteen vs. The Junior Super Patriots and Velveteen vs. The Multiverse.
OTHER: Sparrow Hill Road, Letters to the Pumpkin King.
ANTHOLOGIES: The store doesn't always have everything in stock (there are a lot of them), but they make a solid effort, especially with the newer titles. Feel free to ask! The worst they can say is "sorry."
Because Borderlands does not carry non-fiction, none of the Mad Norwegian Press titles are available from them.
(Post concept gleefully stolen from John Scalzi. I love you, John!)