It's almost time: this weekend I will be a guest at the one and only (and sadly final) AnomalyCon in Denver, Colorado. I...keep swearing I'll never go back to Denver, on account of how I get blazingly terrible altitude sickness, and then I keep going back because people ask nicely. But this still could be the last time!

Where will I be?

Friday, catch me at "Reinventing the Wheelchair" at 6pm in Mesa Verde C, or at "Sex in Young Adult Fiction" at 7pm in Windstar A.

Saturday, find me at "Submitting to the Process" at 10am in Wind River B, "Future Accessibility" at 11am in Windstar A, "Writing Villains" at 6pm in Mesa Verde A, or at "Hell Hath No Fury" at 7pm in Wind River A.

There might be additions to my schedule, so check your program book (and don't ask here, as I have no guarantee about how much internet access I'll have). And of course I'll be signing and smiling and looking faintly confused by the lack of oxygen all weekend long.

Come on down!

This weekend (by which we mean "Thursday through Sunday," because the weekend is a negotiable time period, and doesn't Thursday look fetching in that tiara?) you can catch me at Emerald City Comic-Con in scenic Seattle, Washington! Join me for thrills, chills, and a smashing good time!

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE.

Thursday night, come catch me a Shipwreck, where six great authors destroy one great work of literature. We're doing The Sandman. And I do mean doing. This is not an all-ages event. This is porn. I am a porn lord. Endless help me.

Friday, I'll be signing at the University Books booth (2pm) and the Penguin Random House booth (5pm), and then it's off to Worldbuilders for a fun night of gaming and merriment. Seats are limited but still available as I'm typing this!

Saturday, it's Geek Geek Revolution at 1:30pm and the Death of Belief at 4pm, both followed by signings.

Sunday, come see me at the University Books booth (1pm), and then at the Orbit Books panel (2:30pm). And then watch me run for freedom and the comforts of my own bed, because I expect to be exhausted.

I will have prizes with me every day of the con for folks who find me and answer the trivia questions I will be posting on Twitter. First-come, first-served.

See you there!

Are you a gamer? Do you like things that are fun? Are you planning to attend Emerald City Comic-Con?

I am anchoring a table for this year's Worldbuilder's Charity Party, and there are four seats left for the adventurous.

Come play with me! It'll be a good time. We all need a good time about now.

Yes. Play.

Good.

I am awed, honored, and a little staggered to be able to announce that I will be the Guest of Honor at OVFF 2017, to be held over the weekend of October 20th to 22nd.

For those of you in the filk community, I'm sure you understand what a huge honor this is, and why it means so much to me. For those of you not in the filk community, allow me to endeavor to explain.

Filk--science fiction and fantasy folk music, essentially--is a small slice of fandom that enjoys sitting up and singing songs late into the night. We sing about myths and legends and TV shows and comic books and each other (oh, how we sing about each other). It's not a huge community, with maybe a few thousand people worldwide (at best), but it's a tightly-knit one, and we take care of our own. We have the numbers and the ambition to hold multiple conventions throughout the year, in the United States, Canada, United Kingdom, and Germany.

And the biggest of all these conventions is OVFF, the Ohio Valley Filk Festival, in Columbus, Ohio. It is the Worldcon of filk. It is the brass ring. It is the goal. I was already honored to be their Toastmistress in 2005, and to be asked back is...

Well, it's everything.

I am beyond excited, and I am hoping to see so many of you there. I'm going to try to explain a bit more of what filk is over the course of the next year: let's see if I can't make filkers of all of you yet.

I'm Guest of Honor.

It's a dream come true.

I am in Iowa! I am enjoying the company of my adult friends, who are awesome, and their three-year-old, the Skeleton Girl, who is amazing. I am not the biggest fan of tiny humans, which is why I never elected to construct one of my own, but SG? Is the best tiny human. She's just amazing. I could play with her for hours. I have played with her for hours. So Iowa is awesome.

But! I came here for a con, and a con I shall have! This weekend in Cedar Rapids, the fun begins. Ain't no party like a corn state party, because in a corn state, I am at the height of my powers. BE AFRAID. BE VERY AFRAID.

Thursday.

Pre-con signing event, 6pm. Before the con gets started, a bunch of the attending authors will be signing at the Cedar Rapids Barnes & Noble! No membership required. We hope to see you there.

Friday.

DreamCon Introduction, 1pm. This special con-within-a-con for teens is aimed at teaching writing skills and improving understanding of the science fiction community.

DreamCon Community Building, 1:25pm.

DreamCon Ask Me Anything, 3:05pm.

Opening Ceremonies, 7pm. Let's get this party started!

Saturday.

Zombie Mania, 10am. Whee.

Flipping Fairy Tales, 2pm. Watch me throw things at Jim Hines for an hour while we pretend to be professionals!

Author/Artist Meet & Greet, 3pm. Way too early to start drinking.

GoH Interviews, 4pm. ...but maybe it's a really, really good idea anyway.

Round Robin, 9pm. Once upon a time, there was a girl named Seanan, and she stole her whole panel away to the corn...

Sunday.

In Conversation with Seanan, 11am. I have a moderator? So this is not really an In Conversation... so much as it is some sort of interview that I do not fully understand. There may be a mutiny.

Vogon Poetry/Bulwer-Lytton Contests, 2pm. Welp.

Closing Ceremonies, 3pm. Goodbye, everybody! See you in the corn!

Because it is written in the stars that 2016 should be a month of near-constant travel, I am about to hop on yet another plane and soar off to New York, where I will do business, hug people, and oh yeah, appear at New York Comic-Con, the East Coast's Geek Prom.

So where can you find me? Other than staring longingly at the Marvel editorial team, trying to literally will them into hiring me to relaunch the X-Men?

Thursday.

Mira Grant signing, 2pm, Orbit Booth. I don't actually have booth numbers, but it will be listed in the program/exhibitor guide as either "Orbit" or "Hachette Books," and I will gleefully sign things for you. With my actual hand!

Friday.

Shipwreck, 8pm. This is a separately ticketed event, but believe me, you want to attend. Come and see several professional word people wreck a great book--in this case, The Princess Bride. Mara Wilson is our guest reader. This is also the launch for Loose Lips, the first ever Shipwreck collection. I wrote the introduction!

Saturday.

Scream Queens, 2pm, BookCon @ NYCC - 500 W 36th St. It's a Mira Grant panel, which means it's a party in a haunted house while the corn is closing in. Come for the fun, stay because we won't let you leave.

Signing, 3:15pm, BookCon @ NYCC 6th Floor autographing area. We will sign things, and probably not eat you.

Sunday.

Seanan McGuire signing, 2pm, Penguin booth. Again, I do not have booth numbers, but this one should be listed in the program book as "Penguin Random House." Come see me, and I'll congratulate you on surviving the convention!

It's time for bullet-point updates! Hooray!

* Tomorrow (Tuesday, June 21st) marks the release of RISE, the complete Newsflesh short fiction collection. This book gathers everything from "Everglades" through Please Do Not Taunt the Octopus, along with two never-before-published pieces, All the Pretty Little Horses and Coming to You Live. It's not intended as an introduction to the world--at least four of the novellas are post-the original trilogy, which makes them great whopping slices of spoiler--but I'm incredibly proud of this material, and over the moon about finally having a short fiction collection of my very own. I feel like Stephen King. It's pretty awesome.

* Today is the last day of the Unicorn Empire T-shirt pre-sale for their gorgeous Toby Daye design. Don't miss out!

* CrossingsCon is this weekend! The first ever Young Wizards fan convention, and I'm one of their guests of honor! I keep closing my eyes and remembering standing in my middle school library with So You Want to Be a Wizard in my hand, and I'll be honest: I feel like a wizard right now. In Life's name, and for Life's sake, I feel like a wizard. Because somehow, I have willed the adulthood I wanted into being, and for all that it's not perfect, it's the imperfection that makes it all seem real.

Everything is amazing.

I'm off to Kansas City, and ConQuest! A city I've never been to before, and a con I've never been to before! It's an adventure! (Note, before the comments can start: no, I am not going to WorldCon this year. I'm moving instead. All conventions I am attending are listed here, in the inchworm girl posts, and on the front page of my website. So this is your only Kansas City chance to see me.)

Wanna know where to catch me? Well...

Friday.

The Making of a Great Hero/Heroine, 5:00pm. "Writers discuss what attributes successful heroes and heroines should and often have." This can't possibly end badly!

Opening Ceremonies, 7:00pm. Now, those of you who have seen me during one of these things, you know I have a good time. And since I'm sadly missing closing ceremonies due to the timing of my flight, you should try to make this.

Saturday.

Surviving the Apocalypse, 11:00am. "Listen to panelists come up with a plan for surviving an apocalypse be it zombie or other. You'll want to bring a notebook..." Note that I am much more likely to be the cause of the apocalypse.

How To Become A Published Author, 2:00pm. "Authors and editors discuss the road to success in publishing." Yup.

Autographing, 4:00pm. What it says on the tin!

Sunday.

The Worlds of Seanan McGuire, 10:00am. "Hugo-nominated editor Bryan Thomas Schmidt will discuss the works of Seanan McGuire with Seanan." They were smart and made sure this panel was being conducted by one of my editors, which means it's waaaaaaaay less likely that I set something on fire. Shucks.

I hope I get to see you there! I'll have ribbons!

Hello, happy people! It's time for Emerald City Comic-con, Seattle's largest gathering of pop culture nerds in one building! Like, if the alien invasion comes this weekend, we're screwed. Anyway, if your boots are on the ground in Seattle, and you want to know where to find me, have I got the schedule for you.

Thursday.

I have no official programming! Hooray! So I will be wandering the show floor, seeing people, spending money, and remembering that I am a fan first, and an unstoppable alien terror second.

Friday.

The Orbit Books Panel. 2:45 PM, Room W603. Come join me and a host of other Orbit authors as we talk about the company, our works, and our plans for the future. Also whether harvesting the humans of Earth for food is really a sustainable invasion practice.

Saturday.

Signing at University Books. 3:00 PM, Booth 5100. Come get things signed! I like signing things.

Sunday.

Crafting Characters in Science Fiction and Fantasy. 12:00 PM, Room W603. A good story is nothing without great characters, and this couldn’t be truer when it comes to the tales woven in science fiction and fantasy books. Come and hear authors Peter Orullian (Trial of Intentions), Seanan McGuire (October Daye, InCryptid), Patrick Rothfuss (The Kingkiller Chronicles), Peter Brett (The Demon Cycle), and Bob Proehl (A Hundred Thousand Worlds) talk about what goes into creating a great literary character. Moderated by Paul Constant of the Seattle Review of Books. Y'all, I am super excited about this: Bob Proehl's A Hundred Thousand Worlds is one of the best books I've read so far in 2016.

Signing. 1:15 PM, Autographing Table 29. We'll sign things!

Hope to see you at the con!

It's time for Minicon, the annual convention of the Minnesota Science Fiction Society! I am this year's Guest of Honor, and I'm feeling fancy. So where can you find me?

Thursday.

Guest of Honor Reception, 8:00 PM, Ballroom. Come and meet the guests! Including me! Except a lot of blank smiling and hand-shaking, since I will still be all turned around after my flight from California. It's a party!

Friday.

It's Tough To Be An Introvert These Days: Promotion in the Days of Social Media, 5:30 PM, Ver 3/4. Ahem: "Artists in many fields and are notoriously introverted, but must be able to promote themselves on social media. How has social media changed the promotion of a creator's work? What are some effective strategies for self-promotion that don't feel like self-aggrandizement? What's so bad about self-aggrandizement?" So basically, it's the "how to talk about yourself when it makes you uncomfortable" panel. Yay!

Opening Ceremonies, 7:00 PM, Ballroom. LET THE WILD RUMPUS BEGIN.

How to Survive a Horror Movie, 10:00 PM, Krushenko's. "Well now you've gone and done it, or somebody in your Scooby gang has ... you're now in the middle of a monster movie plot. How do you avoid doing something incredibly stupid that is going to result in making you a tasty, late-night snack? What gear do you need to scrounge up to be able to make it until daybreak? Should you split up (duh)?" Apparently, no one told these nice folks that the best way not to survive a horror movie was to refuse to let me sleep.

Saturday.

Seanan McGuire's Kaffee Klatsch, 10:00 AM, Bar. Okay. The blurb I have for this says "in conversation." Around here, "in conversation" means something specific, and this is not that. This is a Kaffee Klatsch. Sign up if you want to talk to me, in the company of a small group of people, for about an hour. Please do not sign up if you want to attend an "In Conversation...", as this is not that. I'm sorry.

GoH Interview, 11:30AM, Ver 3/4. I dunno who's interviewing me.

Psi Phy - Mental-Based Superpowers in Comics, 2:30 PM, Krushenko's. Quote: "Psionics used to be huge in written SF, but appeared to drop in popularity in the late 20th century. However, in graphic media such as X-Men, psionic concepts such as Professor Xavier's telepathy and Psylocke's psychokinesis are readily accepted. Was this due to the counterculture of the 1960s when such stories originated, rites of passage for teens, or something else?" Thrill as I try to make people's heads explode with my mind.

Parasitology, 5:30 PM, Krushenko's. "Parasites! Parasites! Parasites! Micro-organisms! What are the pros and cons of having a microbial symbiont in a person? What defines a parasites? How much knowledge do we not have about parasites? What's the difference between a parasite, a virus, a symbiote, and bacteria? Probiotics and Antibiotics fight it out! Two microbes enter! One parasite leaves!" I...what?

What's to Love About Horror?, 10:00 PM, Krushenko's. "It can be argued that horror is one of the more maligned sub-genres of SF. Why is it so underloved? What do horror fans enjoy about a scary story? What makes a good horror story? Why is dark fantasy still relevant, and how do the monsters of an era reflect culture? Which tropes still work, and which tropes need to be bludgeoned with an ax?" I'm not sure if this is "let's give them lots of room in the panel topic," or whether it's "let's see who hits who with a chair first."

Sunday.

Mermaids, Sirens, Selkies, and Other Water Creatures and Spirits, 10:30 AM, Krushenko's. "Oceanic water creatures have captured the imagination of humans since antiquity, as well as fresh lake mythological creatures. What are the differences between types of water spririts, such as Naiads, Nereids, and Rusalka? Why have some been portrayed as benign and others as dangerous?" Does it live in the ocean? Yes? THEN IT CAN DROWN YOU DO NOT ANNOY IT.

Interact with the Fae? Lord, What Fools These Mortals Be!, 1:30 PM, Krushenko's. "What are faeries? What are the rules of proper interaction with members of the Fae, especially the Seelie and Unseelie Courts? What types of behavior are especially condemned by the Fair Folk? What means of protection can mere mortals use? How does a creator make meaningful interactions for fae?" I am not responsible if you come to this panel and then get yourself turned into a donkey.

Closing Ceremonies, 3:00 PM, Ballroom. I'mma nap on stage.

Sometimes sitting on news is hard.

I mean, part of my job involves not telling people things until I'm given permission. I'm bad at remembering who I've said what to, and so usually, I just tell people everything, sometimes eleven times; that isn't always an option these days. I have to accept that it's not lying when I refuse to talk about embargoed information. Sometimes I have to accept that it's not lying even when it is, when people go "hey, do you know anything about ________?" and then respond to "I'm not allowed to say" with a smug grin and a "that means yes!"

Silence doesn't always mean "yes," but sometimes people thinking they've tricked me into saying something one way or another can mean that the thing doesn't happen, because now I've run my mouth off and can't be trusted and so I'm off the project. So I sit on news, and I say nothing whenever possible, and I tell absence of information lies when I'm backed into a corner, and I twitch a lot.

Here's my latest point of twitchy goodness:

HOLY SHIT Y'ALL I'M A SPECIAL GUEST AT THE 2016 SAN DIEGO INTERNATIONAL COMIC-CON!!!!!!!!

Me! A Special Guest! At the con I've been attending since I was sixteen! Me! I AM A FANCY LADY AND I AM MAKING A NOISE THAT ONLY BATS CAN HEAR!!!

Sitting on this one was hard. But wow, was it worth it.

I have arrived in Tuscon, Arizona for TusCon 42! I have slept, been fed, and visited ALL THE RATTLESNAKES. My handlers have already lost me repeatedly. We're off to a good start. But where can you find me? Well...

Friday

6pm: Apocalypse: What is the likely cause?
7pm: Meet the Guests

Saturday

10am: Why are the people who say they they are so open spending so much time demanding "these girls" get off their lawn?
12pm: In Conversation...
4pm: Mass Autographing

Sunday

9am: How Possible Are Zombies?
12pm: I WILL KILL YOU
2pm: Bring Back Your Dead

...gotta say, the proximity of those last two panels should worry people.

Arizona! See you here!

Twenty years ago, I built my world around BayCon from January through May, with flashes scattered throughout the rest of the calendar. I hung my social engagements and scholastic achievements in the spaces between meetings and convention duties, and I felt privileged to do it. In many ways, this is the convention that built me.

It's not that convention anymore. Like everything else in my world, like me, BayCon has changed.

This past weekend, I was privileged to do one of the things I would never, as a teenager, have believed I would one day do: I was BayCon's Author Guest of Honor. (This makes me the only person ever to have been the convention's GoH, Toastmistress, and Chair. In different years, but still.) It's a smaller con than it used to be. They do some things radically differently, to the point that I had to step back and go "this is not your con, even though it has the same name" before I could enjoy myself. That doesn't mean they do things badly, or wrong; it was just like visiting a house where I used to live and seeing what color they had painted my room.

This past weekend, I hung out with friends. I did panels. I gave a concert. And sometimes, for a moment, when the light was right, I went back in time.

Not bad for a girl who started in the Music Department.

And speaking of music, my set list. I was accompanied by Paul Kwinn and Kristoph Klover on guitar; Beckett Gladney on harmonica; and Margaret Davis on flute and harp.

1. "This Is My Town."
2. "Phantoms of Summer."
3. "Maybe It's Crazy."
4. "Preston Miller."
5. "Dear Gina."
6. "Mama Said."
7. "Vampire Slayer Blues."
8. "Death Danced at My Party."
9. "Wicked Girls."
10. "My Story Is Not Done."

Encore: "Jack's Place."

"Preston Miller" is by Dave Carter. "Death Danced..." is by Talis Kimberley. Everything else is by me. We had a preschool dance party and sold T-shirts from a table at the back of the room, and it was an amazing end to a lovely con.

I will always miss being sixteen and thinking it was the center of the world.

BayCon is here! I am now officially the only person to have been BayCon Guest of Honor, Toastmistress, and Con Chair! It's a useless accomplishment!

So where can you see me?

Friday.

Opening Ceremonies, 10am. Come see us open the con!

Fan Guest of Honor interview, 10:30am. Thrill as I interview Caradwen Braskat-Arellanes. Because I can.

Breadth of Filk, 1:30pm. Quote, "Just as fanzines has escaped from its fannish roots, filk songs can now cover topics outside of science fiction and fantasy, such as cats, popular culture, and politics. The panelists discuss where you can find filk outside of cons." So, uh...filk!

Meet the Guests, 7pm. We exist!

Saturday.

Writer GoH Interview, 10am. Amber is going to interview me. This should be fascinating.

Researching your Biotech Thriller, 1pm. Quote: "A popular sub-genre that often gets published as mainstream fiction but ought to be viewed as science fiction is the biotechnology thriller, exemplified by Michael Crichton's Jurassic Park. The panelists talk about the behind-the-scenes research that goes into making fictional biotech believable." SCIENCE!

Biology of Mythical Creatures, 2:30pm. Quote: "The storytellers who originally invented the mythical creatures of legend didn't have an understanding of biology, genetics, or evolution. When writing a mythical creature into a new story for a modern audience, how far does a writer have to go in re-imagining the creature's biological backstory? Does providing biological details add to the story, or does it throw off readers because those details clash with their expectations? What are some successful examples of mixing realistic biology with mythic animals?"

Variety Show, 7pm. There will be a variety! It will show!

Sunday.

Toastmistress Interview, 11:30am. Now I get to interview Amber! Mwahaha!

Short Stories, 2pm. It'll be short!

Constructing Urban Fantasy, 4pm. I'll build some stuff.

Concert, 8:15pm. I will be taking the stage with Paul Kwinn. Come hear us sing some stuff.

I am pleased to be able to officially announce that I will be Author Guest of Honor at Minicon 51, held over Easter weekend in Minneapolis, Minnesota. (Well, "in or around," so it may be just outside Minneapolis. The hotel info will be posted soon. And let's face it, if you're coming from, say, Oregon, it's the same difference. Hence why I usually tell non-Californians "oh, I'm from Berkeley.")

The Artist Guest of Honor is Sara Butcher Burrier, whom the website describes as providing a "lighter" view of Faerie. It's gonna be the all-fae, all-the-time convention! Very exciting. Join us from March 25th to 27th, 2016, to learn more.

I get to go to Izzy's*!

(*Izzy's is my second-favorite ice cream place in the world, second only to Jeni's, which bought my love with their pear sorbet. My trips to Minneapolis/St. Paul are basically defined by ice cream and roast beef.)

I am in England! It is...very early in the morning here. This is because I have the jetlag. Please treat gently with me until at least noon o'clock, by which time I will hopefully have consumed ever so much caffeine.

Friday.

Opening Ceremony, 1:45pm-2:45pm. We have a convention. We'd like to break the seal and get things started. Jim's flight has been delayed, so I may be acting as his understudy. Come see me pretend to be Jim Butcher!

The Things We Learned From Pratchett: An Exploration of Fantasy, Story Telling and Ethics, 3:00pm-4:00pm. I am going to miss Terry Pratchett very much. Come miss him with us.

A Modern Bestiary? "Impossible creatures as the focus of literature and art", 5:30pm-6:30pm. BEASTIES! Come talk about beasties, and try to keep me from talking about Pokemon. It's a fun challenge.

Saturday.

Watching the Detectives, 11:15am-12:15pm. Jim will still be jetlagged. I will not. Come see if I am capable of playing nicely with the other children.

Kaffeeklatsch, 1:45pm-2:45pm. Just me and up to ten fans talking informally about my writing. And Pokemon.

The Brains Trust: A Panel of the Living Dead, 4:15pm-5:15pm. Zombies! With MIKE CAREY! Come watch me try not to fangirl. IT WILL BE HARD.

Concert, 8:00pm-until we stop. Me, Talis, and Playing Rapunzel, sharing a stage! Well. We hope. I seem to have acquired a cough on the plane. So I may be a very quiet partcipant.

Sunday.

Truth, Justice, and the Home Office, 11:15am-12:15pm. Yay I get to hang out with Charlie for an hour and it's work!

In Conversation With Seanan McGuire, 3:00pm-4:00pm. It's a daytime edition, which means less swearing, more Pokemon.

Monday.

Faeries, 11:15am-12:15pm. Me. Jim Butcher. Fae. What could possibly go wrong.

Not for the Squeamish, 1:45pm-2:45pm. Let's talk about medical science!

There will also be closing ceremonies, as what has been opened must be closed. I hope to see you there!

So as I write this I am in Jersey City, New Jersey, preparing to tear down my computer and head for the airport, where a big metal sky-bird will carry me to Chattanooga, Tennessee, land of the Chattanooga choo-choo, endless Cthulhu parodies, and ConNooga, an awesome media convention with the good taste to ask me to be a Guest of Honor!

My schedule for the weekend:

Friday, 4:00 PM, Room 12: Writing Dialog.
Saturday, 1:00 PM, Room 12: Reading, Q/A: Seanan McGuire/Mira Grant.
Saturday, 5:00 PM, Room 12: Diversity in Fiction: What is it, How to do it, and Why.

I will be in the main exhibit hall a great deal of the time, happy to sign things, meet people, and complain bitterly about the cold.

I hope to see some of you there!

I'm about to go and be a Guest of Honor at SHAMROKON, the Irish Eurocon, held in scenic Dublin, Ireland! I hope to see you there; if you're not already planning to attend, you probably aren't going to do it on a whim, because it's a long flight from many places. So, well...if you're not coming, you will be missed, and here's all the fun we're going to have!

Friday.

Filk Warmup for the Terrified, 4:00-5:00pm, D. Ulster (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

An intro and warmup session for people who would like to stand up and perform but would like some guidance first. Me and Tim Griffin and stuff about filk!

Opening Ceremony, 6:00-7:00pm, A. Pembroke (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

We're at the con, so we better get this party started! Brian Nisbet (M), Michael Carroll, Jim Fitzpatrick, Gareth Kavanagh, Seanan McGuire, Andrzej Sapkowski, James Shields, Ylva Spångberg. I have no idea what we're going to do to open the con. Maybe there will be a can opener. It's anybody's guess!

Probably gonna have a concert in here. I will post the exact time when I know what it is. Which is sort of terrifying, given that the convention is, you know. Tomorrow.

Late Night Conversation with Seanan, 11:00pm-12:00am, D. Ulster (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

Quoth the con: "Join one of our Guests of Honour, Seanan McGuire, for a casual chat, touching on Zombies, Tumblr, Pokemon, filk, parties and everything inbetween. Bring a drink and an open mind!" I'mma touch stuff. Touchy touchy.

Saturday.

Guest of Honour Interview, 2:00-4:00pm, A. Pembroke (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

I'm going to be interviewed by Janet O'Sullivan! I have no idea how this is going to play out! Maybe I will eat her! Come see for yourself.

Pseudonyms, 5:00-6:00pm, D. Ulster (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

Pseudonyms, anonymous publications and pen names have been a part of SF&F writing ever since Frankenstein was published anonymously. Sometimes they're an open secret to aid branding (eg Mira Grant) and sometimes they're a secret to allow a work to be judged on its own merits (JK Rowling). Ann VanderMeer (M), Laura Anne Gilman, Seanan McGuire.

Jamming Session, 8:00pm-12:00am, C. Munster (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

Tim Griffin and I are apparently doing a jam session. I don't know. Maybe we're making jam. I like jam.

Sunday.

Guest of Honour Signing Session, 10:00-11:30am, A. Pembroke (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

Mass guest of honor signing! Woo!

The Zombie Infection, 1:00-2:00pm, E. Room 1/2 (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

It's spread from film, to books and comics, to songs, to board games, dice games, video games. A look at the cross genre infection, and how each genre is effected by it and what it brings to the brain buffet.

Genre Toys, 3:00-4:00pm, D. Ulster (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

Warning: I'mma talk about Monster High.

Closing Ceremony, 6:00-7:00pm, A. Pembroke (Double Tree by Hilton Dublin Burlington Road).

The end of the convention, where the winners of the ESFS awards and the Golden Blasters will be announced, and trophies will be given out. Victory and survival!

It's almost time for Loncon, Worldcon in London! Hooray! I was so excited when this convention won the bid, and I'm still excited now. But where am I gonna beeeeeeee?

Thursday.

What's In A Name? 4:30PM, Capital Suite 7+12 (ExCeL). Megan Lindholm/Robin Hobb, Iain (M) Banks, Tom/Thomas Holt, James SA Corey, Mazarkis Williams: many people publish under pseudonyms, some more subtle than others. Why do writers opt for a pen-name? Why do some have more than one? How important is "branding" to marketing genre fiction, and what role do genre and gender divides play in the decision? Basically, it's "why are you Mira Grant: the panel."

I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue 10:00PM, Capital Suite 7+12 (ExCeL). Two teams of fans/authors enjoy a battle of wits, and are given silly things to do by their chairman, Lee Harris. Games include: One Song to the Tune of Another, Sound Charades and Mornington Crescent. The con's obsession with scheduling me on late night panels begins.

Friday.

Literary Beer 2:00PM, The Bar (ExCeL). Literary beers are like koffeeklatches with beer instead of coffee. Sign up if you plan to attend!

Signing 7:30PM, Capital Suite 16 (ExCeL). Because I am bad at reading train schedules, this is my only signing of the weekend.

Saturday.

Girl Scientists 1:30PM, Capital Suite 13 (ExCeL). Lise Meitner, Marie Curie, Rosalind Franklin: women have always made a major contribution to science, even if they didn't always get the credit. But how does YA fiction approach female characters with an interest in science? Does YA fiction contribute to, or challenge, stereotyped beliefs about girls and science? What are the best examples, and the worst? Are girl scientists best presented as exceptional, or the norm? And does girl's science have to be pink? SCIENCE.

Seanan McGuire and Dead Sexy in Concert 10:00PM, Capital Suite 7+12 (ExCeL). Me. Dr. Mary Crowell. Amy McNally. Bill and Brenda Sutton. Michelle Dockrey. ALL THE POWERS OF HEL—er, some really rockin' music. Be there or be surprised when our wave of might sweeps over the con and obliterates all in its path.

Sunday.

Authors Accept, Encourage, and Create Fan Works Too 11:00AM, Capital Suite 7+12 (ExCeL). Fanfiction, fan art, and other forms of transformative works can be a sensitive topic with authors understandably having mixed reactions to works based on their creations. In this session four successful authors embrace forms of creative (not-for-profit!) ouput based upon their works. They discuss the benefits and difficulties of having fans creatively engage with their material. Beyond that they openly talk about their own experiences with fan works, whether they have written, still write, or read fanfiction or produce other forms of fan works.

Seanan Leaves For Disneyland Paris 1:00PM, Later Gators. That whole "I can't read schedules" thing? Yeah, I bought non-refundable tickets on the train to Disneyland. I paid enough for them that I'm missing the Hugos (Sunil will be attending as my representative). I would feel worse about this, but...Disneyland. If I win, through some strange whim of fate, Sunil will get to read a speech that opens with "Seanan is already on her way to Disneyland." I find this awesome.

London! I'm gonna eat so much cheese!

It's almost time for the San Diego International Comic Convention, and you know what that means: I am busier than a chicken with a field full of caterpillars to devour, and it's time for me to tell you where to find me. Since otherwise, well...it does not bear thinking of.

Wednesday.

Preview night begins with a bang, and I'll be there the whole time! I am going to be in a wheelchair again, for the duration of this convention, because otherwise I won't survive. I'll have some fun prizes for the first few people to find me during the con. I also have a request: namely, I did not successfully get this year's Monster High two-pack during the pre-sale, and I am not going to be terribly mobile (see again, wheelchair).

If you find yourself in the Mattel line, and if you feel like picking up a two-pack (or two, since I like to unbox one and keep one mint-in-box) for me, I will gladly pay you back. Note that I am making this request because I don't want to pay scalper prices: I'm happy to negotiate some signed books, or mailing you some CDs after the con, but I really am hoping to find a kind soul who's already going through the line and will grab them for me at cost. Don't worry about being Kind Soul #2: I will totally buy as many two-packs as people bring me, because I have nieces and friends who collect.

Bring on...

Thursday.

Orbit booth signing, 11:00am. I/Mira Grant will be signing at the Orbit booth at 11:00am! I don't know what they'll be giving away vs. what they'll be selling, but I will also sign books you bring with you. Big fun!

When Magic & Myth Meet Main Street, 3:00pm. Join me, Amber Benson, Jim Butcher, Richard Kadrey, Thomas Sniegoski, and Greg van Eekhout as we discuss urban fantasy and why it's AWESOME. Room 25ABC, to be followed by a signing in the Autographing Area.

Friday.

Penguin booth signing, 11:00am. I'll be signing at the Penguin Booth, along with some other awesome authors, and you should totally come. There may be cool surprises...

Saturday.

The Art of Fear, 2:30pm. It's time to get creepy. Join me, G. Michael Hopf, Katherine Howe, April Genevieve Tucholke, Brenna Yovanoff, and James Rollins as we talk about what scares us, and what should scare you. Room 8, to be followed by a signing in the Autographing Area.

California Browncoats booth signing, 11:00am. One last signing to finish out the weekend and make everybody's morning a little more terrifying.

Mind you, all this assumes that we're going to survive the Rising; events may be canceled at any time as zombies eat us all.

Even as a zombie, I will still want those dolls.

Every year around this time, someone says to me "Gosh, I've never been to the San Diego International Comic Convention before. I don't see what the big deal is. I really don't believe it's as big as everybody tries to make me think it is." And every year, I smack myself in the head and update this guide and pray for their survival.

Since I've been posting these obsessively-detailed Guides to Comic-con on a yearly basis for some time now, I strongly suspect these people are being aimed at me. But since I love you all (those of you I know, anyway; I am well-inclined by amiably indifferent toward those of you who just came in out of the cold), and want you to have the best convention experience you possibly can, I have once again updated my Handy-Dandy Survival Guide to the San Diego International Comic Convention. See? It's handy and dandy, and that means it must be good! This guide includes tips on:

* Reaching the convention alive.
* Getting a hotel room.
* Enjoying/surviving the con.
* Things to do at the con.
* Eating food.
* Staying healthy and sane.
* Not getting killed by your friends.
* Budgeting.
* Bathing.

It is also heavily biased toward my own opinions on all these things, because hello, totally me. But I'm honest about my biases, and I'll be factual whenever it's fact, rather than opinion. (In short, don't expect me to falsify hotel room rates to suit my own ideas of "fair," but don't expect me to recommend a good Thai place, either.)

Ready? Okay!

( Click here for Seanan's handy-dandy Comic-con survival guide! Read and be enlightened in all the ways that matter, which is to say, all the ways that Seanan actually thought of. Freshly updated for 2014.Collapse )

Tomorrow morning I shall rise, bright and early, and head for the airport, where a plane will be waiting to take me (and a bunch of strangers, that being the way of air travel) away to glorious Minnesota, where the state bird, the mosquito, will no doubt be waiting to carry me away.

Why am I going to Minnesota? Why, 4th Street Fantasy, of course. My schedule for the weekend:

Friday.

I will be doing the Writer's Seminar all day. Now, since this starts at 9am, and I will be several hours ahead of my normal time zone, I do not promise coherency before around noon. But hey, that's where some of the best advice comes from, right?

Saturday.

Originality and Micro-genre, 9:30am. To quote the con: "Readers who are versed in a sub-genre and its conventions can find what outsiders see as minor variations on a theme to be significant and original differences. How does this relate to the frequently expressed desire among critics for originality and ambition, and how is the perception of originality informed by the breadth/focus of readers' experiences?" To quote me: "Why do you hate sleep?"

Sunday.

Influence, Tropes, and Prior Art, 11:30am. To quote the con: "Authors who came before them influence nearly every author. Is it easier to be influenced by certain styles of work, or in certain ways? To what extent do we model our works on existing texts or narrative templates, and how often are those influences visible when reading the finished product?" To quote me: "Hooray! Sleep!"

So this should be a super-fun weekend, and all the programming looks great. Plus you'll get to see me in a sleep-deprived haze, and that's gonna be awesome. Hope to see you there!

People ask me "well, did you have fun?" a lot. After conventions, after signings, after anything that would have involved me appearing in a professional capacity. I generally smile and say I had a very nice time, but that's not always enough. Some people want to know, for sure and for certain, that I had fun. That I am riding my giddy inner parade float off to Candy Mountain, land of sweet sugary joyness, and not counting the minutes until I can take off my shoes and stop trying to interact with humans.

This is difficult for me.

Here is what I do for fun at a convention: I cruise the dealer's room, sometimes for hours, looking at things I have no intention of buying, spending too much money at the same time. I go back to my hotel room and eat M&Ms while watching cartoons on whatever kid-oriented channel the hotel includes as part of its cable package. Sometimes, when I have a few hours of downtime, I attend a concert or get someone to drive me to the nearest Target, where I buy cranberry juice and Diet Dr Pepper and more M&Ms.

Here is what I do not do for fun: everything else.

I love being a guest at conventions. It's one of my natural environments. I grew up at cons, I'm good at cons, I always have a nice time. I always have a good time. Even at the con where I had an allergic reaction so severe that I spent literally three hours in my hotel room huddled around the toilet bowl and crying, I had a good time. But I don't have much fun. Fun is not the reason I am there. Like the girls on reality shows who aren't there to make friends, I am not there to enjoy myself: I'm there to work.

When I am a guest at a con, I am there to help you have fun. I'm there to listen and speak and sign and sometimes give hugs. I'm there to hand out ribbons and admire tattoos and do whatever is asked of me, because I'm working. I am at work. My job is awesome and enjoyable and I am so, so lucky to have it; sometimes I can't believe how lucky I am to have it. I wouldn't change it for anything. But every time I do something I consider "fun" (latest example: chasing lizards around the rocks at Disneyland), I am reminded that no, I am not at conventions to have fun. And that's a good thing.

I am making more fun for you.

I'm Guest of Honor at NORWESCON, in beautiful Seattle, Washington! It's time for fun with crows, evergreens, and rain! If you're planning to be in the area, here's where you can find me throughout the weekend:

Thursday.

5:00pm, Guest of Honor Banquet. I am not on the menu! But I believe banquet tickets are still available, and you can put food in your face. Yum!

7:00pm, Opening Ceremonies. We are gonna open the shit out of this convention.

Friday.

1:00pm, Reading. I have copies of Sparrow Hill Road, and I'm not afraid to open them...

3:00pm, Feminism in Fandom. Let's play Bingo!

5:00pm, Lifetime Members' Banquet. Food. Again.

8:30pm, Vixy & Tony concert. Come see the ever-amazing Vixy & Tony in concert with Betsy Tinney and Sunnie Larsen, as well as musical aid from yours truly.

10:00pm (roughly), my concert. I'll be honest here: it's basically the same set-up. There's not going to be a hard line between us so much as "first set list is finished, we pause to pee, second set list begins." I highly recommend attending both. I'll have CDs, T-shirts, and posters for sale.

Saturday.

1:00pm, autograph session. I'll sign shit!

5:00pm, Q&A. Come with your Qs, I'll show you my As.

Sunday.

4:00pm, Closing Ceremonies. Find out who next year's guests will be! Watch this year's guests try not to pass out on the table! Good times.

Hope to see you there!

It's time for Emerald City Comic-Con, Seattle's very own answer to the fact that San Diego has become the Mordor of Nerds! It's an awesome three day event in lovely downtown Seattle, and once again, I'm going to be bringing down the house in my own inimitable (and occasionally awkward) fashion.

I have one program item this year: "Beyond the Genre in Genre Fiction" on Friday morning at 11:40am. I am appearing with a bunch of truly awesome people, including Kory Bing, who some among you may remember as the illustrator for the InCryptid Field Guide. I am super excited! You should come!

If you can make the con but can't make my panel, I'll be around throughout the weekend, and am happy to sign things if spotted. Or if not spotted, but then the things may not belong to you.

Emerald City!

Just a friendly reminder that you can see me and the ever-awesome Tim Powers this very weekend at FOGcon, in Walnut Creek, California. Enjoy a small convention atmosphere with awesome guests, awesome attendees, and a lot of awesome things to do. It's a trifecta of awesome, and I hope I get to see you there!

(Sadly, the cats do not enjoy car rides, so Thomas will not be making an appearance. But my mother will, and you know you want to meet her. She's a lot of fun.)

Yay, FOGcon!

Filk Continental happens in Germany. It happens in a castle. It is one of the only filk cons I have never attended, because it is very far away, and up until recently, I have had very limited vacation time.

It's still far away. But this year, I'm going...and I'm going as their Special Guest! Yes! After a year off, Filk Continental is gloriously returning, with Vixy & Tony as their Guests of Honor, and me as their Special Guest. A German appearance! A fantastic party! A glorious time!

October 3rd through 5th: the website and details are here: http://www.filkcontinental.de/fc/home/index.php.

I'm so excited!

Hey, people of Earth (and parts beyond)! Remember that this coming weekend I will be the Author Guest of Honor at SFContario, appearing with such luminaries as David Kyle and Chandler Davis. I alone lack that essential "davi" construction: come to shore me up, lest I be destroyed.

I'll be doing an awesome concert Friday night, and there will be awesome things throughout the weekend; if you're in the Toronto area, please consider swinging by to get a little awesome on your shoes.

Hey, happy people! In less than twelve hours, I will be boarding a giant metal sky-bird to fly to Denver, Colorado, home of very little oxygen, very impressive floods, and Mile Hi Con, where you'll have the rare opportunity to see me and Cat Valente together on stage! (Okay. Not that rare. We do this whenever people let us. But still.)

You can see me at...

Friday.

7:00PM: Opening ceremonies.
9:00PM: The Return of Kitty and the Midnight Hour. Hosted by Carrie Vaughn! With me and Cat as awesome guests!
10:00PM: Run, Run, The End of All Flesh Is Upon Us: Cat Valente and Seanan McGuire in Conversation. It's like an Evening with Kevin Smith, but a lot boobier, and sometimes even swearier.

Saturday.

11:00AM: Mad Scientists in Fiction, Film, and Filk.
2:00PM: Autographing! With Carrie! I love Carrie.
4:00PM: An Hour With Author GoH, Seanan McGuire.

Sunday.

9:00AM: Kaffeeklatch.
11:00AM: GoH Remarks and Awards.
1:00PM: Write On!
3:00PM: Conquering Sexism in Geek Culture.
5:00PM: Closing ceremonies.

I hope to see you all there! Or at least all of you for whom it is vaguely physically possible. Yay, Colorado!

It's almost time for LoneStarCon 3, the 2013 World Science Fiction Convention in San Antonio, Texas! This will also be my fifth Worldcon in a row, which is a feat I haven't accomplished since I was a teenager, working the convention, and traveling largely on the kindness of the adults who mentored and took care of me. It's...it's a little weird, honestly. So much has changed, and so much has stayed the same. I'm still a fangirl in my heart, even if I'm not behind a reg desk or stationed in prog ops anymore. I just scurry around more these days.

But enough introspection! Where can I be found?

Thursday.

6:00pm: Seanan McGuire and Dead Sexy, Live in Concert! It's the latest iteration of my ever-shifting backup band. Except familiar songs, fun surprises, and some exciting musical times. Ballroom A.

Friday.

10:00am: Kaffeeklatsch: James Gunn, Seanan McGuire, Lezli Robyn. Come have coffee and chat about whatever. Space is limited, signups are required. Riverview (Riverwalk).

4:00pm: Autographing: Tanya Huff, Steve Jackson, Seanan McGuire, Kim Stanley Robinson. I get to sign with Tanya! I am happy. Autographing area (Convention Center).

6:00pm: SF Squeecast Live Recording. It's gonna be fun. It always is. 003B.

Saturday.

12:00pm: Writing about Music and Art. I'm on a panel! Conference 12.

4:00pm: Reading: Mira Grant/Seanan McGuire. Which of me will read? NO ONE KNOWS. Also I'm up against the Mark Does Stuff panel, so you should totally skip me and go see him be awesome. 007CD.

Sunday.

12:00pm: Mad Science. From my heart and from my hands, why does no one understand my intentions? 008B.

2:00pm: When will Zombies Die? Charlaine and I are on the same panel. Bets on how long before one of us starts telling knock-knock jokes? I'mma sit between her and Bear and be totally safe from the apocalypse. 007CD.

4:00pm: Urban Fantasy: Fairies around Every Corner. I am going to be running out of this panel like my ass is on fire the second it ends, because I need to get ready for the Hugo Awards, but oh won't we have fun until then? 006A.

Monday.

Flying back to California.

Hope to see you in Texas!

...I swear that is the last terrible Muse pun I will make today. Ahem. It's time for Musecon 3! Do you want to know where I'm going to be?

Friday.

Why Fanfic is Awesome and You Should Feel Good About Writing It. All modern literature is fanfic, from Shakespeare and Milton all the way to the fairy tale retellings and remixes of today. Let's talk about why fanfic is a glorious, time-honored tradition that can help you improve as a writer, enriches your life as a reader, and pushes the envelope of the narrative story. 4:30pm.

Opening Ceremonies and Ask Seanan Anything. Welcome to MuseCon! Come meet our Guests of Honor and find out what we've got in store for you over the weekend. And once the official festivities are kicked off we'll be hosting the lastest installment in Seanan Shows Why She Has a Hugo for Not Shutting Up (also known as "Ask Seanan Anything, although she may not answer, and would really prefer you not ask anything about potential future changes to living conditions/locations"). 7:30pm.

Saturday.

Street Pennies. There's too much negativity in the world, and sometimes it can be hard to remember why we keep trying. That's where street pennies come in. Let's talk about the little things that make you happy, and how to find more of them in the world. 10:30am.

Gender Balance, Inclusiveness, and Diversity. Humanity is not a one-gender, one-race, one-creed entity. We're all different, and we're all deserving of our turn on the stage. Come join our discussion on how to bring more balance, inclusiveness, and diversity to your work. 1:30pm.

Velveteen vs. the Multiverse Book Launch. We don't have books but we will have cake! And signed book plates, and order forms. 3:00pm.

Concert. Music. Bring your ears and listen to Guest of Honor Seanan McGuire and her Biohazard Backing Band light up our stage with her unique mix of fairy tale folk, humorous horror, mad science, and just plain fun. BONUS! The dancing hands of Elise Matthesen will be hard at work during Seanan's concert! Elise has created hundreds of unique, breath-taking pieces, some based on the works of Neil Gaimen and others, some inspiring works by Mr. Gaimen, Elizabeth Bear, and others. Now she’ll be putting that same unique style into each piece that she is inspired to bring to life during Seanan’s show. Immediately after the concert these just-created pieces will be auctioned off! So come enjoy the show, and then see what’s been inspirited along the way! You never know, one might just inspire you. 7:30pm.

Sunday.

Disney Didn't Start the Fire. Snow White ate an apple--or did she use a poisoned comb? The little mermaid lived--or did she? Let's talk about the folkloric and fairy tale roots of some of our favorite stories, and how they've changed right up to the modern day. 12:00pm.

Working Through the World. Constructing a world that works can be difficult, but it's one of the most rewarding things a creator can do. Join us for a discussion of worldbuilding, its logic, and its dangers. 1:30pm.

Closing Ceremonies. We're going home! WE'RE GOING HOME! 3:00pm.

I'm going to San Diego! I'm going to my favorite con! I'm going...to be in a wheelchair for most of the week, on account of my left foot stops being in any way useful after I walk about about an hour, and San Diego is all about the walking. So if you're trying to find me, look for the faintly disgruntled looking blonde girl being pushed by the equally disgruntled looking blue-haired girl. Or follow this handy guide.

Wednesday.
It's Preview Night. I'm going to be in lines. Lots of lines. Unpredictable, never-ending lines. Do not try to find me. Save yourself.

Thursday.
No scheduled events. Naturally, this is also the only day with no panels I give a damn about. What is my life.

Friday.
I will be signing as Mira Grant at the Orbit Booth from 4:30 to 5:30pm. There will be some limited free books and other fun surprises.

Saturday.
I will be signing books for the California Browncoats from 2:00 to 2:45pm. Show up, meet fun people, and support an awesome charity. Then, at 3:00pm, I will be signing for Carniepunk at the Simon and Schuster Booth. This will last until 4:00pm, or until the line dies down completely.

I have not given booth numbers because I don't know them off the top of my head, but your program guide will know them. Trust the program guide. It is your only hope. The program guide will never lie to you. The program guide will not tell you to set people on fire.

Sunday.
This is my busy day. At 12:00pm, I will be in room 24ABC for the panel Science Fiction and the Future with lots of other lovely people. As I am the only biofuturist on this panel (with the possible exception of David Wellington, whom I will be meeting for the first time), I fully expect to either be very quiet or make people turn very green. Either way, what fun! Come for the science, stay for the creepy pie. Signing to follow immediately afterward, which I will be leaving early, because...

At 2:00pm, I will be in room 24ABC for the panel Witches and Fey, Monsters and Mortals. DO NOT READ THE PANEL DESCRIPTION. There is no possible way in which this panel description is not a sexist sack of eels. There are two urban fantasy panels at this con: one is serious and almost entirely male, and then there is this one. That being said, the panel lineup includes Rachel Caine and Amber Benson, who are two of my best ladies, and we are going to make this the panel to remember for this year's SDCC. Assuming anyone shows up, since we're up against the Doctor Who panel. Bleah. Again, signing to follow.

This year's schedule means I will be missing the X-Men panel, so anyone who does get to go, I'd like a full report.

And that's my San Diego. See you on the floor!

I am pleased to announce what some of you already know: that the 2015 Westercon will be held in scenic San Diego, California, and that I will be attending as their Fan Guest of Honor, thus checking off one of the only two slots remaining on my con guest bingo card! (The other, "Artist Guest," is unlikely to happen unless I start painting again, so I feel that I have now completed my duties.) The full lineup is:

Author Guest of Honor: Spider Robinson
Artist Guest of Honor: John Picacio
Special Guest: William F. Nolan

Westercon 68 will be held over the July 4th weekend in 2015 (July 2nd to 5th), and I very much hope to see you all there!

Westercon!

In the comments on my post on how difficult it is to harass people by mistake, people are branching into the cosplay discussion. It's still pretty mild here, because y'all are awesome, but I've seen it get fairly intense elsewhere. IE, "That girl over there who's dressed up like Black Widow is inviting me to stare at her, so how can the same rules of harassment apply to her?"

Well, first, the same rules of harassment apply to her because she's a goddamn human being, and all human beings, regardless of what they do or do not choose to wear, deserve to feel safe and be free from harassment. Second, the same rules of harassment apply to her because we're human beings, or alien anthropologists who know damn well where the standards for human behavior lie, and once we're old enough to buy convention memberships and book hotel rooms, we should know better. (We should know better before then, too, but that's a matter for our parents.)

I have several friends who do cosplay, both at general science fiction conventions and at larger genre conventions, such as San Diego Comic Con. This means that they are going out in public in outfits they have spent a lot of time and energy making, which may or may not be as concealing as standard street clothes. (One of my friends regularly cosplays Emma Frost. Another has won awards for a Na'vi costume which consists largely of incredibly well-applied body paint.) This also means that they are inviting a certain amount of looking at them: no one puts that much effort into looking amazing when they don't want to be looked at.

Note that "look" and "leer" are not the same word.

What is appropriate? Admiring a cosplayer's costume. Admiring how well they fit the character. Asking if you can take a picture (providing they're not in the middle of doing something else at the time, like say, trying to inhale a hot dog before their next panel, running to the bathroom, or otherwise being a biological creature in a material universe). Asking if you can take a picture with them. Asking about the workmanship that went into the costume's design.

What is not appropriate? "I really love it when a girl with decent tits dresses up as [character]." Trying to take pictures of disembodied lady pieces, like butts or boobs (also inappropriate: disembodied dude bits—they're just rarer). Quizzing them on whether or not they even know who they're dressed up as. (Spoiler alert: anyone who spent ninety hours making a picture-accurate Illyana Rasputin costume probably knows who she is, and if it's someone who, say, joined a group costume to make their friends happy, but prefers DC/spends too much time gaming to read comics/is really happier in the SCA, how is that hurting you any? There is no such thing as a fake geek.) Asking if they'll give you a spanking. Asking how much they charge by the hour. Asking if you can touch them.

There is something magical about meeting a really good cosplayer dressed as one of your favorite characters. They're avatars. Watch a small child meet someone dressed as Iron Man or Aang and see them stare in open-mouthed awe. Hell, watch me meet a really good Tinker Bell at a Disney park. Costuming is a form of magic. It makes the unreal concrete and tangible. It deserves respect.

But those Tinker Bells that I meet at Disneyland have handlers, people who will immediately step in if anyone crosses a line or makes the pixies uncomfortable. What's more, those Disney pixies are paid to be my fantasy, as long as that fantasy remains G-rated and friendly. Cosplayers? Not getting paid. They are people, and they have a right to the ball. They also have the right to say "please take your hand off me" or "please don't take pictures of my ass" without getting told "well, you shouldn't have dressed like that if you didn't want the attention." Wanting attention and wanting to be harassed are very different things.

And as a note: cosplayers are not harassing you by walking around being attractive, or semi-clothed, or interesting to look at. They are not "teases" or "gagging for it" when they put on something skimpy. They are not here to be anyone's private walking skin magazine. They are people.

(Yes, this means they can be inappropriate too. We had an issue at one of the comic conventions a few years ago with someone dressed as Deadpool inappropriately touching female attendees, and then running away. He couldn't be distinguished from the eight or so Deadpools not being giant sacks of asshole. Last year at Emerald City Comic-Con I observed two woman dressed as Jean Gray saying such nasty things about a woman dressed as Emma Frost that she was virtually in tears. None of these things were, or are, appropriate.)

Cosplay makes our conventions more visually arresting. It's a powerful form of expression. It's a hobby and a passion like any other. But costume does not equal consent.

Again, if this is something you can't trust yourself to grasp, maybe you need to stay home.

I will be appearing at Harvard University's very own Vericon this weekend, along with such luminaries as Tamora "I shaped your childhood and swear like a sailor" Pierce, and N.K. "We were on the Hugo ballot for the first time in the same year and are now bound in blood, ink, and tears" Jemisin. It's going to be awesome! Even if it does require me to fly to Boston first. In the middle of the winter. To where the snow lives.

If you're local to the Boston area, swing on by! Here's my schedule:

Saturday 12:30pm-1:30pm: A panel on constructing identity; how to flesh out different types of characters, as well as writing to an audience that identifies as fans of speculative fiction.
Saturday 2:00pm-3:00pm: A panel on supernatural/nonhuman creatures; how writers create concepts of supernatural creatures or interpret pre-existing myths; additionally, how to write sympathetic nonhuman characters.

I will also be signing on Saturday from 4:30-5:15pm at the Harvard Bookstore, along with some of the other authors. Whole lotta shin, little bit of dig.

I hope to see you there, and I hope you'll bring me Diet Dr Pepper, because the jet lag is going to be brutal on this one. Seriously. You may get to see me having a conversation with the space lobsters, and that's always fun.

Vericon!

T-shirt update.

Shirts are being mailed! But in the interests of not being stoned to death by the other people who use my small local post office, they're being mailed in batches of twenty to thirty at a time. What does this mean? It means that if you have not yet received your shirt, it probably hasn't been mailed, but is instead sitting in a large sack in my living room. If you ordered three or more shirts, there is a good chance that your order is coming in more than one envelope. Breathe deeply, and it will be with you soon.

CDs and stuff.

I have sent a restock of both Wicked Girls and Red Roses and Dead Things to CD Baby. I estimate that I have roughly a hundred copies of Red Roses left, after which the CD will be out of print. I'm not currently planning a reprint, so, y'know, get it while it's available.

My cats are weird.

This morning, Thomas decided that he was going to accompany me to work, and attempted to accomplish this by stuffing himself into my backpack. It astonishes and terrifies me that he can fit inside my backpack; he's a lot of cat, and there are other things inside that bag. But he did it! And if he'd remembered to pull his tail inside, he might have made my day a lot more exciting than I ever wanted it to be.

The Pirates of Emerson.

Just a reminder to my Bay Area friends: the Pirates of Emerson have opened their annual haunted theme park at the Alameda County Fairgrounds. Five awesome haunted houses, two mazes, the Bumpkin Patch, live entertainment, games, and more, all presented by spooky-ass pirates who leer and go "arrrrrrr" whenever provoked. It's a lot of fun, it's super reasonably priced for what you get, and I highly recommend it.

(I do not, however, recommend it for kids under twelve, or even for easily frightened kids under thirteen. You can still take them if you want, but you can't blame me for the night terrors and bedwetting that may follow.)

Best shirt ever.

My friend Craig sent me an official CDC Zombie Preparedness Task Force shirt, and it is the best shirt ever. I am the happiest disease/zombie fangirl in the whole wide world right now.

One con more...

I have only one convention left in 2012: WindyCon in Chicago, this coming November. After that, I am blissfully home free for the (admittedly short) remainder of the year. Which means a) if you wanted to catch me at a con, Windy is your last chance this year, and b) I might actually take a nap.

Although that's unlikely.

Oh, the places you'll go, oh, the places I'll be! Here's where to start if you're looking for me...

Thursday, July 12th.

1:15 PM, Room 6A: Not with a Bang, with a Bite.

It's the obligate zombie panel! Because really, that's what I do. Join me-as-Mira, along with Jeyn Roberts (Dark Inside), Michael Spradlin (Blood Riders), Diana Rowland (Even White Trash Zombies Get the Blues), Stephen Blackmoore (City of the Lost), Dana Fredsti (Plague Town), Susan Dennard (Something Strange and Deadly), and Max Brooks (World War Z). Let's see if Max and I can get into another argument about his virology, shall we? Also, you will love Stephen. He's the bomb. The panel will be immediately followed by an autographing session, wherein I will sign whatever you bring me.

Friday, July 13th.

5:00 PM, Booth 1116: Mira Grant signing.

Nothing says "Friday the 13th in San Diego" like Mira Grant signing at the Orbit booth! Come for signatures, cool swag, and the chance to have me beam at you like a lunatic while I try to drink enough Diet Dr Pepper to put me in an early grave. It'll be fun!

Saturday, July 14th.

10:30 AM, Room 5AB: Hot Town: Faeries in the City.

Mmmm, 10:30 AM panel on Saturday. On the plus side, you know you'll be able to get a seat. On the double-plus side, you know none of us will be awake enough to be filtering a damn thing that comes out of our mouths. Come for the urban fantasy, stay for the raw humor value of me and Jeff Lewis calling each other cockwaffles. Join me-as-Seanan, along with Benjamin Tate (Leaves of Flame), Kevin Hearne (The Iron Druid Chronicles), Kat Richardson (Seawitch), Jennifer Bosworth (Struck), Anton Strout (Simon Canderous series), Jeanne Stein (Anna Strong Vampire Novels), J.F. Lewis (Void City books), and S. G. Browne (Lucky Bastard). The panel will be immediately followed by an autographing session, wherein Jeff and I will begin chewing on Kat.

Sunday, July 15th.

12:00 PM, Room 32AB: Browncoat reading.

Mira Grant joins the San Diego Browncoats for a reading from "San Diego 2014," and to answer any questions you might have. And yes, we know this is up against Buffy. Stupid late schedule changes.

1:00 PM, Booth A-07: Mira Grant signing.

And then it's off to the Browncoats booth for a signing! Hooray for signings!

...and that is all my official business for the weekend. Unofficial business will include shopping, panels, ice cream, Amy-hugs, Amber-hugs, Sunil-hugs, Kaja-hugs...hugging is going to be a key part of this convention.

Onward, to San Diego!

Ladies and gentlemen of the 2012 World Science Fiction Convention membership...have you remembered to cast your vote for this year's Hugo Awards? Because if you haven't, you're sort of running out of time; July 31st is your last day to vote.

I am reasonably sure that each and every person on that ballot wants to win. I am no different. But almost as much as I want to win, I want to know that if I lose, it will be because every possible voter looked at the works up for consideration, looked at their ballot, and made their choice fairly and well. I want you all to vote. I want to lose because I lost, not because there was a sale at Ben and Jerry's and we all got rightfully distracted because dude, ice cream.

Please. If you are eligible to vote, it has never been easier to get a clear view of the entire ballot. Thanks to the tireless efforts of the Hugo committee, we have an electronic voting package that is a bibliophile's dream; you can read and consider absolutely everything that's asking for your vote. And if you're not a member yet, but were thinking about it, you can still register with full voting rights if you do it soon.

And because I really love this quote, I am once again quoting Cat Valente. Specifically: "A final note: you do not have to go to Worldcon to nominate and vote for the Hugos. You can buy a supporting membership for $50 and get that perk. I realize $50 is a lot to express an opinion, but every year we hear complaints about the ballot and every year I hope that my generation will vote a little more, because the Hugos are kind of a bellwether for the field, and I want new crackly risktaking goodness in there, too. Since I have no control over the price of the supporting membership all I can say is—give it a thought, if you have the scratch."

Make this year's Hugo winners the ones you think deserve those shiny rocket ships.

Vote.

Every year around this time, someone says to me "Gosh, I've never been to the San Diego International Comic Convention before. I don't see what the big deal is. I really don't believe it's as big as everybody tries to make me think it is." And every year, I smack myself in the head and update this guide and pray for their survival.

Since I've been posting these obsessively-detailed Guides to Comicon on a yearly basis for some time now, I strongly suspect these people are being aimed at me. But since I love you all (those of you I know, anyway; I am well-inclined by amiably indifferent toward those of you who just came in out of the cold), and want you to have the best convention experience you possibly can, I have once again updated my Handy-Dandy Survival Guide to the San Diego International Comic Convention. See? It's handy and dandy, and that means it must be good! This guide includes tips on:

* Reaching the convention alive.
* Getting a hotel room.
* Enjoying/surviving the con.
* Things to do at the con.
* Eating food.
* Staying healthy and sane.
* Not getting killed by your friends.
* Budgeting.
* Bathing.

It is also heavily biased toward my own opinions on all these things, because hello, totally me. But I'm honest about my biases, and I'll be factual whenever it's fact, rather than opinion. (In short, don't expect me to falsify hotel room rates to suit my own ideas of "fair," but don't expect me to recommend a good Thai place, either.)

Ready? Okay!

( Click here for Seanan's handy-dandy Comicon survival guide! Read and be enlightened in all the ways that matter, which is to say, all the ways that Seanan actually thought of. Freshly updated for 2012.Collapse )

The John W. Campbell Award for Best New Writer is currently open for voting! This award uses the same nomination and voting mechanism as the Hugos, even though the Campbell Award is not a Hugo, and will be presented this year in Chicago, during the Hugo Awards Ceremony. Having been on the Campbell ballot in 2010, I can testify that it is a huge, huge honor to be nominated, and that it gets your name in front of a lot of eyes that might not otherwise have heard of you.

(I can also testify that winning is amazeballs best thing oh my sweet Great Pumpkin corn maze paradise wonderful. But that's probably true of winning most awards that you really, really want.)

If you are currently a member, either Attending or Supporting, of Chicon 7, you are eligible to vote for the Campbell Award, along with the Hugo Awards. If you're not a member, either Attending or Supporting, you can view the membership rates by clicking right here. A Supporting Membership comes with voting rights and the complete Hugo packet, and is only $50.

Because writers who are eligible for the Campbell are, by their very nature, relatively new writers, it's possible that you don't know anything about this year's candidates. Jim Hines has sensibly decided to help you with this little problem, and has conducted interviews with all five of this year's nominees. Go, read, and be enlightened!

We have a truly awesome class of Campbell nominees this year; any one of them is worthy of the tiara. Because remember, the Campbell is one of only two major genre awards that comes with a tiara (the other is the Tiptree).

In closing, I present the comic strip I drew to commemorate my own eligibility:



TESTIFY!

...so yeah. This is going to be one of those moments where Seanan Is Not Cool, Yo. So:

I'M GOING TO IRELAND YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!

Ahem.

I am pleased to announce that Dublin has won their bid for the 2014 Eurocon, to be called "ShamroKon." It will be held the week after the London WorldCon, thus allowing anyone with extra vacation time to do two awesome conventions for the price of one. And guess who one of their Guests of Honor is?

Oh, you're all good guessers.

So I'm going to Ireland! For only the second time ever, and for the first time in well over ten years. I am like, super-excited, and totally honored, and this is going to be the best! Convention! EVER!!!!!!!

More information to come, but mark your calendars now!

1. To clarify a point from all the shirt posts: please don't email now asking if your shirt has been mailed. Your shirt has been mailed. I don't know where it is anymore. The post office does what it will do, but as we have not, thus far, had anything vanish while in transit, I am relatively confident that your package will get to you. It can take up to a week within the US, and up to three weeks outside the US. If you are in the US and don't have a shirt by April 15th, or outside the US and don't have a shirt by May 1st, that's when we should become concerned. (That's a lot of time on purpose. I want to give the post office the chance to find things.)

2. Texas was gorgeous, and College Station was amazing. I realize the state's unusual weather meant that it was basically all dressed up for my West Coast eyes—it rained for several weeks before my arrival, so everything was green and covered in wildflowers—but first impressions matter, and my first impression was "This place is gorgeous." Definitely an E-ticket of a state.

3. Midnight Blue-Light Special has been turned in to The Editor, which means I can focus on all the other things that I'm supposed to be writing right now. No, it never ends. Which is also kind of awesome, even if right now, all I want to be working on is InCryptid. Stupid muse and her stupid laser focus. Oh, well.

4. Thanks to trusting the travel gods to see me safely home on Sunday, I managed to upgrade my two flights in coach to a single through flight in first class. Let me tell you, first class is a nice way to fly home. Also, there was free digital cable on the flight, so I watched Jennifer's Body, Zombieland, and Pandorum. Awesome, even more awesome, what the fuck were these people thinking.

5. Also on the topic of first impressions, thanks to this lingering cold, College Station's first impression of me was "scratchy-voiced, foul-mouthed, evil pixie." I can definitely settle for that.

6. Tonight, I do laundry; tomorrow, I pack for Emerald City Comic Con. Because it never really ends once it begins around here. I'm super-excited to see my Seattle family, go to my first ECCC, and hug Amy Mebberson lots and lots. My life is empty if I don't hug an Amy once a month. True fact. And my beloved Amy McNally went home after Consonance.

7. The cats are filled with hate, because the suitcases will not go away. I begin to fear retribution. On the plus side, their "retribution" usually takes the form of sleeping endlessly atop the objects of their annoyance.

8. The new Monster High characters are starting to ship, and my local Toys R Us is once again seeing me two and three times a week as I check in, looking for Rochelle Goyle and the basic Jackson Jekyll (he previously appeared in the beachwear line, Gloom Beach, which means this is the first time he's been available with all his accessories). Luckily, I have a tolerant mother, and tolerant friends.

9. For those of you in the UK, I have a column in this month's issue of SFX Magazine! Or, well, Mira does. I wrote an article about why The Stand is a classic and you should read it. US folks, you'll be able to pick up the issue next month. I'm really pleased with it.

10. Jean Grey is still dead, zombies are love, and the Great Pumpkin watches over us all.

So I made a post about FOGcon and why it is awesome last week, and people seem very excited, and that's fabulous, because I really want this convention to do well. But somehow "here is this con, you should go" got read by quite a few people as "because I will be there." And sadly, I won't be. FOGcon is the same weekend as the Emerald City Comic Convention in Seattle, and I'm already committed to heading up into the green.

Please, please, if you're local, consider FOGcon as an awesome way to spend your weekend, and I'm super sorry if my original post was misleading to you in any way. I was just trying to help out a friend who had asked me to post, and it honestly wasn't my intention to confuse anyone.

English is hard. Let's have strawberry ice cream.

And now for something completely different: a few words about a convention. No, not one where I'm a guest, although I have several of those to talk about this year (too many, if you ask the cats, who want me to stop traveling and stay home already).

I'm talking about FOGcon.

FOGcon (or "Friends of the Genre") is a literary-themed San Francisco SF/F con in the tradition of Wiscon and Readercon. It's small, fresh, and still forming its traditions. Better yet, it's being held in Walnut Creek, California, my home territory, which makes it awesome. This year's guests are Nalo Hopkinson and Shelley Jackson, with Mary Shelley as their Ghost of Honor, and this year's theme is "The Body."

This is a friendly, cozy convention with a lot of potential to grow into something amazing. I'd love to see the West Coast have its own successful entry into the literary convention world, and it's very well-timed, being held from March 30th to April 1st, when the weather will be amazing here (and still cold almost everywhere else).

If you think this sounds like something you might enjoy, check out the website and consider your options. I don't think you'll be sorry that you did.

This advertisement was not paid for by anyone. The magical moon ponies told me to do it. OBEY THE PONIES.

My planned Newsflesh novella for 2012 is a little piece entitled "San Diego 2014: The Last Stand and Final Fall of the California Browncoats." It's the story of what really happened when the Rising came to the San Diego International Comic Convention. Blood will spill, heads will roll, and a wonderful time will be had by all. The story will be set largely in 2014, with some modern-day narration and stitch-together from Mahir Gowda and Lorelei Tutt.

Where do you come in? Well...

The California Browncoats are auctioning off two Tuckerizations in this story, to benefit Equality Now. You can find details, and a link to the auction, in their original post. The first Tuckerization auction is live now; the second will be going live on November 20th.

What do you get if you win? Well:

1. I will write you into the story.
2. You will die horribly.
3. It will be awesome.

Also, if there is ever a printed edition of "San Diego 2014," I will supply two copies to the California Browncoats, signed, to be delivered to the winners of these auctions. This is one of the biggest tragedies in the history of the Newsflesh universe, and you have a chance to be a part of it. Literally. I mean, you can die.

Questions? Ask 'em here! And consider wanting a little zombie mayhem for your holiday season.

I am absolutely delighted to announce that I will be the Guest of Honor at Windycon 39, to be held November 8-11 2012 in Lombard, Illinois (right near Chicago). The theme of the convention is ZOMBIES, which makes me basically the perfect guest in every possible way (no false modesty here). Even better, my beloved Amy McNally is their music guest, which means that Windycon 39 will be a veritable PERFECT STORM of SHEER AWESOME.

I am very excited, and I hope to see you there!

Also: a few people who knew about this early (not from me) spilled the beans, and I started getting cranky emails from people who wanted to know why I wasn't announcing the convention here or updating my website to reflect that I was going to be attending. The answer? I wasn't allowed. Please remember that regardless of what you know, I can't acknowledge things I don't have permission to talk about yet, and that includes convention guest invites that haven't been announced or confirmed by the con in question.

I can't wait to see you all in Illinois...and that's why I haven't been saying anything up until now. It's been a secret.

What will I be doing at WorldCon in Reno? Apart from hyperventilating? Well...

Thursday, 11:00-12:00. Music for Creative People.
"What music inspires you? What gets your creative juices flowing? Do artists listen to different types of music than writers do?" Join me, the ever lovely Maya Bohnhoff, and two awesome people I don't know as we talk about listening to music. Points if you can accurately guess the number of times I'm going to bring up the Counting Crows!

Thursday, 3:00-4:00. What's Up with Zombies?
"Why are zombies so popular anyway and what is it about all these mash-ups? Is this the future of the field?" Since I don't do mash-ups, cheese and crackers, I sure hope not! But we get to talk about dead stuff, and that always makes me happy.

Thursday, 5:00-6:00. Literary Beer.
Me. Paul Cornell. Alcohol. The opportunity to hang out with me, or Paul Cornell, and alcohol. Or no alcohol, and then you can laugh at the people who declared themselves pro-alcohol. It's up to you!

Friday, 12:00-1:00. Concert.
Am I doing a concert? Yes I am. Will it feature some of my very favorite people, like Vixy and Amy and Mary and Betsy and Tony, oh, my? Yes it will. Will it be awesome? I surely do hope so.

Friday, 1:00-2:00. Tricky Pixie Interview.
I get to sit down with the members of Tricky Pixie and grill them at glorious length about their habits, hopes, dreams, and where they were on the evening of August 16th. Come and watch the glorious chaos!

Friday, 11:00-1:00. Whose Line is it Anyway?
Since I tend to be an early riser, I feel the need to make it clear that this game show begins at eleven o'clock at night, ending at one o'clock in the morning. And this is why I'm sleeping in on Saturday. But it's worth it for a night of glorious improv with some wonderful madmen (and madwomen). Definitely not to be missed.

Saturday, 11:00-12:00. The Role of the Companion: The Impact of the Companions on the Doctor.
This panel starts at a more Seanan-friendly eleven o'clock in the morning, praise be to the Great Pumpkin, and is going to involve me, Tara, and a lot of other lovely people talking about Doctor Who for the better part of an hour. My life, so hard.

Saturday, 12:00-1:00. Meet the Campbell Award Nominees.
Alas, one can only keep the tiara for a year, and one of these lovely souls will be inheriting it at Saturday night's Hugo ceremony. Watch me moderate Saladin Ahmed, Dan Wells, Larry Correia, Lev Grossman, and Lauren Beukes in a low-stakes battle of wits. We'll all be too strung-out worrying about the awards to be more than moderately dangerous.

Saturday, 3:00-4:00. Bill Willingham Guest Dialog.
Who gets to grill Bill Willingham about fairy tales, folklore, and what he had for breakfast? Is it me? Yes. Yes, I do believe it is. Come see the carnage!

...after this, my Saturday dissolves in a haze of getting ready for the Hugos, attending the pre-Hugo reception, flailing a great deal, attending the Hugos, and then crying, either with relief or because I haven't slept in four days. Roll on Sunday, shall we?

Sunday, 12:00-12:30. Reading.
Imma read things. Things that take roughly twenty minutes to read. It'll be fun. Promise.

Sunday, 1:00-2:00. Autographing.
I am in the same autographing session as George R.R. Martin. Please show up, or I'll spend the whole hour inking, and feel vaguely vexed.

And that's my WorldCon! Hope to see you there. Reno's no Australia, but I bet I can rustle up a venomous buddy...or two...

Ah, July. When a fan girl's thoughts turn to sweet San Diego, city of a thousand delights, fairy tale wonderland of geeky goodness...at least for a week. We roll into town like the biggest circus ever, make a huge mess, drink all the rum in the county, and then disappear, leaving city coffers fuller and city children more confused. It's a good life. And now, now...now I tell you where to find me.

No Damsels in Distress Here. Thursday, 4-5 PM.
Chicks kick ass! According to the panel description, "danger just might be these girls' middle name." (Toby's middle name is actually "Christine.") Come see me trade barbs and witty banter with Marie Lu, Kathy Reichs, Chloe Neill, Jeanne Stein, Merrie deStefano, Carrie Vaughn, and Sherrilyn Kenyon. Moderated by Maryelizabeth Hart of Mysterious Galaxy. Room 25ABC.

Note: The panel will be immediately followed by an autographing session in the autograph area.

Orbit booth signing. Friday, 11-12PM.
Hey, look, it's Mira Grant! I'll be at the Orbit booth on Friday morning, eleven to noon, signing books. Perhaps your books. Perhaps someone else's books. Don't you want to find out?

Writing the Apocalypse. Friday, 4-5 PM.
It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine, yo. Also, my name is listed first on this panel description, which is a San Diego first for me. Yay! Come see me argue the end times with Thomas Mullen, Anna North, Walter Greatshell, Richard Kadrey, Daniel Wilson, Isaac Marion, and Steven Schlozman. Maryelizabeth Hart is moderating. Fear for her soul. Room 7AB.

Note: The panel will be immediately followed by an autographing session in the autograph area.

Penguin booth signing. Saturday, 12-1PM.
How many things can I sign in a weekend? I'll be at the Penguin booth Saturday from noon to one, signing things as my actual self. You should totally show.

SFX booth signing. Sunday, 11-12PM.
SFX Magazine makes me happy, so I'm going to make them happy by being their trained booth monkey for an hour. I will sign things! I will smile! Maybe I will sign your things! This is your last chance to catch me in an official capacity this year, so you should take it. I'm just saying.

And that's San Diego! Hope to see you there.

This one just came in from mimisgrotto, and I wanted to make sure it wouldn't get missed in the grand hullabaloo surrounding the ramp-up to San Diego:

"One from the other side of the tables:

"Please remember that the artists exhibiting are people too, not machines.

"Some artists will fill up their commission lists quickly, others will ebb and flow in waves. We are all trying to be fair and serve people in order they come to us. So if an artist says they're full, don't think that you are any special exception for 'just this one little thing'.

"There are only so many hours in the con day, we need food and bathroom breaks too and some of us actually like to relax and rest after hours instead of be bent over commission art until 3am. If we could accommodate every person who asks for a sketch or a commission, we would. Please understand if we just can't.

"Also, don't use your adorable children to try and get free art. It's awesome that so many parents share the con experience with their kids, but there is the odd entitled parent and we CAN spot you. The denizens of Artist Alley aren't just there to be seen, we've spent lots of money like you to come to Comicon and we're here to earn our living in a very crowded, tough industry.

"So if something free is only an autograph or a quick doodle rather than an hour-long marker sketch, don't get huffy. You get what you pay for.

"Be courteous and pleasant and GET THE HINT that if an artist is REALLY focused on their work rather than enraptured by your verbatim recount of your Favorite Episodes of Dr Who, it's time to move on and leave them to it."

One of my favorite things about attending conventions in person is having the ability to commission artwork from artists I adore. My walls can attest to this habit. But seriously, it's like a win-win party scenario. I get amazing art that no one else has; the artists I love get to keep their lights on; and best of all, by putting dollars in their pockets, I keep them coming to the conventions. I love it! That being said...

Artists are working. You may be at the convention to play, but they? Are at work. Do you want me to come up to Amy's table and distract her while she's trying to draw your awesome Muppet Rose Tyler? No? Then why would I want you to come up and distract her while she's trying to draw my Emma Frost?

Things that are not distractions for most artists:

* Looking through folders.
* Looking at prints.
* Having a brief, friendly conversation.
* Giving them money.
* Asking if the commission lists are open.

Things that are distractions, all of which I have witnessed at one time or another:

* "Can I get a free one? I'll tell all my friends about you."
* "Oh, hey, let me see what you're working on."
* "You're really hot. Do you have a boyfriend?"
* "Oops, sorry, I/my small child didn't mean to rip that." (Not followed by payment in this instance.)
* "Have you seen Firefly? There's this one episode where..."

Visit Artist's Alley! Take this amazing opportunity to see and purchase artwork, some of which can be created just for you. But remember that the artists are there to make a living, and that trying to bargain that $50 sketch down to $20 because you think it's fun is potentially going to get you stabbed with a colored pencil. (Also, I highly recommend visiting Amy Mebberson and James Silvani, who will have EPIC mashups of EPIC EPICNESS.)

See you in San Diego!

In case you missed the memo, I'm one of the Guests of Honor at Convergence 2011 in scenic Bloomington, Minnesota. How soon is this? Well, my plane leaves tonight at six, so...

I'm super-excited about this convention, where I get to room with one of my favorite people (Tara, my web graphic designer), hug Cat Valente a whole lot (Thomas still wants to know why I let her leave), and generally enjoy the hell out of one of my favorite states. Also, Soundingsea (the lady I named Buffy's blog after) is taking me to Izzy's for ice cream. Om nom nom. Best convention ever! And here, for the curious, is my schedule:

Friday.

Reading, 2:00 PM. What am I reading? I do not know! Suggest something, I'm flexible.

Ask a Writer, 3:30 PM. G'head. Ask me about writing. I dare you.

Signing, 5:00 PM. Specifically, we will be signing Chicks Dig Time Lords and Whedonistas, although let's face it. I'll sign anything you put in front of me that isn't a small child or a legally binding contract.

An Evening With Seanan McGuire and Catherynne Valente, 7:00 PM. Look. We're not kidding when we call this event "An Evening With Kevin Smith, Plus Tits." We are profane. We are bizarre. We will talk about damn near anything that comes into our heads. We are eventually going to become the darlings of the fannish lecture circuit, so you should see us early, while you can still get good seats. Although we'll have to end mostly on time, because...

Whedonistas, 8:30 PM. Ra ra Joss. Ra ra ah-ah-ah, we all got his bad romance, yo.

Saturday.

Happy Writers, Fast Writers, 12:30 PM. Gimme a Diet Dr Pepper and I'm both!

Chicks Dig Live Doctor Who Commentary, 2:00 PM. I did not realize until I was making this list that we're commenting on "The Parting of the Ways." Oh, I am going to need so much boozimohol not to get inappropriate...

Signing, 3:30 PM. Since many of you will doubtless have attended the group signing, this event may be me, my comic book paper, and a lot of inking. And I am okay with that, although I'd love to see you again.

Sunday.

Chicks Dig Comics, 12:30 PM. Yes. Yes, we do.

The SF Squeecast, 3:30 PM. This is going to be our first live recording of our awesome new group podcast, which is getting ready to go live. It will also be the first recording I have done while fully clothed, since again, live. I have now used the word "live" too many times in this panel description.

Closing Ceremonies, 5:00 PM. This is where I get to kill and eat the con.

I hope to see as many of you there as possible, and I plan on having a fantastic time. Hooray for Minnesota!