* Locate my little glass pumpkin full of Australian currency, and figure out exactly how much of it I have. This will be the start of my WorldCon budget, and no matter how much I enjoy sticking my fingers in my ears and going "LA LA LA LA LA," I really need to stop doing that and start coping with the fact that it's almost time to fly.

* Revise and process the editorial notes on the next twenty pages of Deadline. I'm currently through the end of chapter four, and I'd really like to get through the end of chapter five before it's time for bed. I also need to finalize my dedication, and start thinking about my acknowledgments, which is always fun like sticking needles in my eyes. Oh, how I love this part of the process. Not.

* Attempt to unearth my dresser from beneath the epic pile of crap that has accompanied me home from San Diego and Spocane. This may or may not be something I can accomplish without the use of a flamethrower.

* Fish the cat toys out from under the bed.

* Brush the cats.

* Attempt to integrate the epic pile of crap that accompanied me home from San Diego and Spocane into my bedroom without causing some sort of avalanche or otherwise hitting critical mass and opening a black hole into another dimension. Of course, if the objects responsible for opening the black hole influence the dimension on the other side, it will be a dimension filled with flesh-eating My Little Ponies and telepathic velociraptors. So that might be a nice place to have a vacation home.

* Trade the July pages in my planner for the shiny, new, relatively unmarked September pages. Immediately start filling the September pages with to-do lists, deadlines, goals, and the other unavoidable roadmaps of being me. I actually find this process quite soothing, in a nit-picky, obsessive sort of a way. Here is my month. I have scheduled panic attacks, showers, and laundry. Go me.

* Pick up my mats from the Aaron Brothers, allowing me to frame the latest batch of art. This batch includes the cover to Late Eclipses, two original Skin Horse strips, and the original artwork for Amy Mebberson's amazing Sarah Zellaby sketch. I need more walls. I seriously need to move into a house designed by Escher, just to give me sufficient walls.

* Laundry.

* Go to the comic book store and collect my latest dose of four-color sanity check. I also need to update my pull list, as it's time to (once again) winnow my monthlies down to trades. It saves space, money, and staples, as Lilly really likes to eat comic books. No, I don't know why. I've asked her, but she just meowed and wandered off to chew on the shower curtain.

* Fish the cat toys out from under the bed.

* Inform Alice that I am not going to fish the cat toys out from under the bed a third time.

* Fish the cat toys out from under the bed.

* Finish composing my first blog entry for the Babel Clash I'm doing with Jesse in September. Since we're both going to be traveling when the blogs go up, they have to be pre-written, and since I've been traveling so damn much recently, I haven't had a chance to pre-write anything. This would be funny, if it weren't verging on becoming an emergency.

* Continue my quest for a dress for WorldCon, since the dress I was having made isn't going to be ready for this year, due to bad time management on my part coupled with a really silly comedy of dropped clauses and missed connections. I keep thinking I've found a dress, only to discover that no, it's not going to work out. I'm considering hysteria.

* Ignore the Maine Coon telling me that her toys have disappeared under the bed.

* Watch Warehouse 13.

* Sleep.

So before we get too far from the convention, a few high (and low) points of San Diego 2010. Because otherwise, y'all will beat me with bricks in a dark alley somewhere, and I just don't have time for that.

This year, I was able to import Tara and Amy (webmistress and fiddler, respectively), and the three of us shared a room with Sunil (media madman) at the Gaslamp Marriott. Not only were we less than a five minute walk from the convention center, allowing us to easily drop things off in our room, but the hotel gave us free candy. Right there at the front desk, free candy. Amy and I decided that we were having the convention experience we would have designed for ourselves at age seven. Except for the drinking, this was probably true for the entire weekend.

Rebecca and Ryan were kind enough to pick me up from the airport; after they dropped me off, Amy and I went to get our badges while the car went back for Tara and Sunil (landing two hours later than I did). Hilarity and admission followed. Tara went off to hang with her friends, while Sunil, Amy, and I went to see an improv performance by Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em. They were decent, and the show was fun (especially since Amy got me a Long Island Iced Tea). The only real downside was Sunil accidentally ditching us while we were in the bathroom, but we went and met Rebecca and Ryan for Wendy's, so there was really no bad there.

Thursday was my first panel, The Power of Myth, which was a lot of fun, as was the signing which followed. I gave Amber Benson a copy of An Artificial Night, which she thanked me for, as now she would not be required to steal it. Tara, Amy, and I had lunch with Tanya Huff at the Cafe Diem, because the Cafe Diem is awesome. I also shopped. A lot. I enjoy shopping. I got a White Phoenix Jean Gray doll for my cover designer at Orbit, because I believe in bribery, yo. It was fun!

Thursday evening, Tanya, Tara, and I attended the Brilliance Audio author dinner, which I spent drinking Mai Tais, eating interesting things, and chatting with Phil and Kaja Foglio. My life, so hard.

Friday was my booth signing at Orbit, during which I signed a hundred copies of Feed. In the process, I drew ninety-nine tiny chainsaws, and one tiny Godzilla destroying a city. Again, my life, so hard. I had to miss the X-Men panel to do the signing (wah!), but I was able to attend the panel on James Gunn's Super (he needs to call me), which looks totally awesome. I had a second signing at the SFX booth later in the afternoon, and we gave away another fifty copies of Feed, one to the creator of Being Human. Totally awesome.

Friday evening, Tanya, Amy, and I attended the Penguin FangFest, which I spent drinking pineapple mojitos, eating cupcakes, and chatting with awesome authors. I finally met Charlaine Harris in the flesh, and it was hysterical. Exchange as follows:

Me: "Hi, it's great to finally meet you. I'm Seanan."
Charlaine: *politely blank look*
Me: *displays name tag*
Charlaine: "SHAWN-ANNE!"

*hugging*

I love having a weird name. After that, we went to the Boom! party, where I met Paul Cornell and his lovely wife, Caroline. Paul is one of my favorite humans, as he shares my love of the Black Death and giant flesh-eating lizards. I'm just saying.

Saturday was my second panel, The Rise of Zombie Fiction, which was a) mad fun, and b) reinforced my desire to write up a handbook for people doing panels at this sort of thing. Priscille from Books for Boobs came to the signing in a perfect Delirium costume, and I tried to eat her plush bear. Amy and I managed to catch the Warehouse 13 panel (Allison Scagliotti for Georgia Mason, anybody?), and then went off to dinner with John Grace at a very nice steak house. They served me port. MY LIFE, SO HARD.

Sunday, it was goodbyes and final shopping runs, and Tara and I had breakfast with Paul and Caroline before Amanda and Michael came to carry me away.

It was a good con. This writeup does not include hiding behind Anton, getting awesome swag and buttons from Rae, lots of hugging, accidental soda-based encounters, the dissolution of the Sacred Order of the Deli, ice cream, Gini Koch, late-night sammiches with Tanya, awesome dealer's room finds, free books, cheap books, expensive books, cookies, the art show, or repeat encounters with Felicia Day. But it does include a lot of awesome.

Also, if anyone came away from the con with a spare Sanctuary T-shirt, I am open to trades. Just saying.

1. admnaismith to the white courtesy phone, admnaismith to the white courtesy phone; you have won an ARC of An Artificial Night. Please email me with your contact information, using the contact form on my website, before Sunday, or a new winner has been selected. Also, I totally need you to come make me a drink, because damn.

2. Evolution is awesome, and more bizarre than you can possibly imagine. The best thing about real life is the way that it doesn't even need to pretend to make sense. Also, it allows for factual statements like "those little hornless males have giant testicles" and "they change their color pattern and rearrange their tentacles in a more typical female arrangement." How can you not love this world?

3. Actually, you know what's better than evolution? Drunken paleontologists being allowed to name the dinosaurs that they have discovered. Yes. Thanks to the glorious power of beer, the chasmosaurine ceratopsid family has a new member: the Mojoceratops. How can you not love this dinosaur?! It has a heart-shaped frill, people. A heart-shaped frill. This is like, Barbie's Dream Dino. Great Pumpkin, thank you for the drunken paleontologists and their glories. Thank you.

4. Remember that I'll be at Borderlands Books in San Francisco, California this Saturday, appearing with the lovely jennifer_brozek as part of the second stop on the Murder and Mayhem Tour. Also, we'll have delicious cupcakes from Cups and Cakes Bakery, because we all know that's really why you attend my book events with such alacrity. Be there if you can!

5. We're less than a week out from the San Diego International Comic Convention, which, this year, I will be attending with Amy McFiddler and the fantastic Tara in tow. So, y'know, that should be a good time, apart from all the flailing and hysteria. I'll be posting my panel schedule early next week, and if you're going to be at the convention, you should totally let me know. I'd love to see you.

6. X-Men: Second Coming is over. Several characters are dead. I'm sad about some of them, not so much about others (and barely remembered a few). I really want them to get Elixir on the business of growing back the various severed limbs, as, well, this is all a bit grim for an X-book. But hey, Jean Grey is still dead, Emma Frost is still pretty, and we still have three Stepford Cuckoos wandering around. So it's hard not to be happy.

7. Other things that make me happy: Warehouse 13, Eureka, Unnatural History, Leverage, and So You Think You Can Dance. Why yes, I am a media whore. Why do you ask?

8. Zombies are love.

9. In addition to the San Diego International Comic Convention being in less than a week, I'm about two weeks out from SpoCon, where a) I'm the Music Guest of Honor, and b) Tanya Huff is the Writer Guest of Honor. DAW GIRLS IN THE HOUSE! We shall wear our Urban Fantasy Mafia colors with pride, yo.

10. The turtle can't help you, but Alice will be happy to shed on you. Just ask her.

What's news with you?

Hello, and welcome to my journal! I'm pretty sure you know who I am, my name being in the URL and all, but just in case, I'm Seanan McGuire (also known as Mira Grant), and you're probably not on Candid Camera. This post exists to answer a few of the questions I get asked on a semi-hemi-demi-regular basis. It may look familiar; that's because it gets updated and re-posted roughly every two months, to let folks who've just wandered in know how things work around here. Also, sometimes I change the questions. Because I can.

If you've read this before, feel free to skip, although there may be interesting new things to discover and know beyond the cut.

Anyway, here you go:

( This way lies a lot of information you may or may not need about the person whose LJ you may or may not be reading right at this moment. Also, I may or may not be the King of Rain, which may or may not explain why it's drizzling right now. Essentially, this is Schrodinger's cut-tag.Collapse )

Item the first: I have run the random number generator against the latest ARC contest, and saladofdoom is our winner. saladofdoom, you have until Sunday, July 4th, to contact me with your mailing information. (This is longer than I usually give, but I'm about to head for Westercon, so I'm not going to be checking mail reliably for a few days.) I can also just bring your book with me when I come up to Seattle next weekend. Let me know your preference, and it shall be done.

Item the second: Yesterday morning, I saw a single crow sitting on the telephone pole next to the bus stop, watching me. "One for sorrow," I thought, and followed it up with, "But where's the sorrow?" Immediately, a car drove through a puddle that shouldn't have been there, it being, you know, July, and spattered me with lukewarm water. The message is clear: do not taunt the crow oracle, yo. You will not enjoy the results one little bit.

Item the third: The editorial revisions of Late Eclipses are barreling merrily along, and reminding me once again that there's a reason we do multiple passes on these things. So far, I've found an appearing/disappearing jacket, an appearing/disappearing car, a totally misnamed architectural feature, and a chunk of dialog that seriously read like it had been pasted in from another book. Thank the Great Pumpkin for the editorial process.

Item the fourth: My mother came by last night with my sister and her wife in tow. They have once again absconded with a very large sack of books, because I am the family lending library. I treated them to the hysterical spectacle that is Alice trying to get me to give her wet food, because I am a cruel, heartless lending library. (Their favorite part was when I picked her up, and she tried to swim through the air to the bowl.) It was nice to see them, even if it did mean I had to save the second half of this week's Leverage for tonight.

Item the fifth: I am watching the second half of this week's Leverage tonight.

Item the sixth: I should have some very concrete information about Wicked Girls super-soon, and it's really shaping up to be amazing. I love working with Kristoph, and I love all the material on this album. Both of my cover songs have been approved ("Tanglewood Tree" and "Writing Again"), and since I wrote the other fourteen, I'm not particularly concerned. I'm so pleased with this whole process. Life is good.

Item the seventh: My dreams last night featured a tank of lionfish that wanted snuggles, two connected houses in a suburb of San Francisco that managed to look exactly like Concord, buying new luggage, trying to fly to Australia while balancing on a bathroom railing, taking a nap, and a visit to the tiara store. I'm reasonably sure this was a big ol' anxiety dream about Australia and the Campbell Award, but I woke up going "awwwwwwwww, cutest lionfishes ever." This proves that not even my own brain is very good at upsetting me.

What's new with you?

1. Only four hours remain to enter my random drawing for an ARC of An Artificial Night! It's probably the simplest contest I'm going to have, so what have you got to lose, right? Besides, they're pretty. I like pretty things. I am a simple soul.

2. Speaking of pretty things, remember that the ALH pendant sale will be starting today at Chimera Fancies. I cannot possibly overstate how much I love Mia's pendants. If I were a wealthy woman, I'd just pay her to sit around and make them all day, and keep the bulk of her output for myself. Again, simple soul. Also, occasional magpie.

3. Leverage comes back this weekend! So You Think You Can Dance is back on the air! Cartoon Network has Unnatural History and Total Drama World Tour! Oh, I love you, summertime television. I love you so much, forever.

4. Tomorrow is my last pre-Westercon rehearsal with the fabulous Paul Kwinn, renowned in song and story, master of the meaningful look while wearing a gaudily-patterned shirt, husband of Beckett, whom I love beyond all reason. I'm very excited, despite the fact that I'm still occasionally coughing like I'm on the verge of actual death. It's gonna be awesome.

5. I have my editorial notes for Late Eclipses, and I'm busily incorporating them into the finished manuscript...while, possibly, fixing a few little language issues at the same time. It's been long enough since I touched this book that it appears to have been written by an alien, which is the best time for doing editorial. It's still my baby. It's just my weird alien baby, and that makes it more fun to autopsy.

6. Zombies are still love.

7. It's June already. That means we're getting closer and closer every day to my departure for Australia, LAND OF POISON AND FLAME, which I have only been dreaming about for most of my life. I'm so excited it's scary, and not just because I'm on the ballot for the Campbell (although that remains a constant GOTO loop at the back of my brain). I get to go to Australia! I get to breathe Australian air! My life is awesome sometimes.

8. We've entered the final stages of recording Wicked Girls, and it should, I hope, I pray, be able to make the October release date that I so optimistically set for myself. I'll be announcing the pre-orders soon, since that's how I finance mixing and mastering, and I'm really, really happy with this album, as a whole. It's just...it's what I wanted. And that's incredible.

9. I think the cats are stealing my will to leave the house. I just want to sleep.

10. I need more ARC contests! Suggest something. Be silly, be serious, request that I do your favorite all over again, whatever. I need ideas, and so I turn to you, the glorious Internet, to give them to me.

It's Friday!

Bit #1: Toby has actually made it to the final four in the GIRL FIGHT TONIGHT, and she and Professor McGonagall are running literally neck-in-neck. Consider that a moment. Toby is a viable contender for defeating Professor McGonagall. The world has gone insane, and your vote could help her get to the finals, where she can have the pleasure of having her ass handed to her by Granny Weatherwax. Which is a victory unto itself, really.

Bit #2: Alcestis [Amazon]|[Mysterious Galaxy] is a retelling of the classical Greek myth of Alcestis in the Underworld, and is just breathtakingly gorgeous. I am glad to own this in hardcover, because despite it taking up additional space, it is now sturdy enough to survive the many, many re-reads that it will be receiving as the years slip by. It's a beautiful book. Pair it with Malinda Lo's Ash and you have the perfect late Valentine (or early).

Bit #3: Castle has been picked up for a third season, guaranteeing me another night of brilliant television as time goes by. I really feel like I'm in something of a golden age, television-wise. I have my caper show (Leverage), my wacky science fiction (Eureka, Warehouse 13), my serious science fiction (Fringe), my comedy (Big Bang Theory), my mystery (Castle), and my good-n-gory (NCIS, Bones). Really, the networks don't need to do anything new with the upcoming season. I'm good.

Bit #4: Toby is still a contender in the Fourth Annual BSC Review Tournament, but her current round—in which she's going up against Juliet Marillier's Heart's Blood—remains very nearly too close to call. We're moving toward the end of the tournament, and it would be bad-ass to progress at least one more round, so please, if you have the chance, bop over and drop a vote.

Bit #5: I am apparently writing at least one short story (and maybe more than one, knowing me and my scary over-achieving ways) set before A Local Habitation, focusing on and narrated by January O'Leary. You can meet her girlfriend! Who is awesome, and puts up with an immense amount of crap from her scary technophile significant other.

Bit #6: Wondercon is this weekend! I am super-excited, and plan to spend the entire weekend wandering the floor, seeing awesome stuff, and learning new and exciting things about the X-Men. Because there is always something new and exciting to learn about the X-Men. (Hopefully not "Jean Grey is coming back," but things can't be wonderful forever.) I have also purchased my tickets for San Diego, which becomes a little more real every day. GEEK PROM IS GO!

Bit #7: Starfish loves you.

So I'm hammering away on the sequel to Feed (which is potentially going to be going through a name change before much longer; watch this space for news), and I have about 13,000 words to go before the book is over. It's a little weird to realize that I'm so close to being finished with the first draft. Feed took me the better part of two years to write...but then, Feed required me to front-load a lot of the research, reading, and world construction that this book is cheerfully benefiting from. Half the work is done for me already.

I guess this means book three will be a cake-walk, huh? Or something like that.

(I find myself planning another trilogy after this one is finished, involving genetically-engineered parasites, mind-control, symbiotic evolution, and lots of other lovely things. The books are called Parasite, Symbiont, and Predator, at least for right now. Because I really needed to be working on more books, right?)

The German editions of Rosemary and Rue showed up today, and they are absolutely gorgeous. The book is called Winterfluch in German, and wow, do they have nice standard paperbacks over there. My mother promptly stole a copy, because that's what my mother does, and I've placed one ceremonially on my expanding shelf o' Things What I Wrote. I'm sure it's semi-cheating to have multiple editions of the same book, but if it has a different cover, I really don't care. It's increasingly amazing to look at the shelf. Stunning, and amazing. I can't wait to add Feed in the US and UK editions.

I'm catching up on NCIS before I head off to bed, to dream of zombies and parasites and cupcakes and blue cats and all those other wonderful things that keep me busy through my days. Hope your week is going wonderfully, and remember, Locus says you need a copy of Rosemary and Rue.

My flight back from Seattle to San Francisco touched down about twenty minutes before eight last night. We were actually early, which was a trifle annoying, as it meant that all the post-landing announcements interrupted the episode of The Wizards of Waverly Place that I'd been watching (yes, I am a total dork). Oh, well. At least it was one I'd seen before. I collected my suitcase from the baggage claim, met Mom at the escalator, and was promptly toted across the Bay Area to home, where I was greeted by a stack of mail and two incredibly irritated blue cats.

People who haven't met my cats often fail to understand exactly how good they are at making their annoyance known. These people need to be shut in a room with Lilly, Alice, and an empty food dish for half an hour. At the end of this time, they will understand a) that my cats are perfectly capable of explaining, in the detail, their displeasure, and b) I should get hazard pay for entering the house without feather toys and treats.

Thankfully, my girls aren't good at being mad for long. After a night of cuddling and a morning spent watching Boa vs. Python (with the pair vying for dominion over my lap), I seem to have been essentially forgiven. They still aren't letting me out of their sight, but that isn't all that unusual.

Over the course of my time in Seattle, I ate cupcakes, baked a turkey, made insane numbers of cookies, saw Die Hard for the first time, went to several bookstores, gave a concert, embarked on a successful quest for cranberries, reached 90,000 words on Blackout, formally turned in the first Sparrow Hill Road story, watched all of season one of Glee, played with kittens, rewrote about half my website, and hugged many people I love.

It was a good holiday break. I hope yours was just as lovely.

1. Remember that voting is still open for the second A Local Habitation ARC giveaway, and while there are a few clear favorites, it's still anybody's game. I'll announce the third giveaway as soon as I figure out exactly what it's going to be.

2. A Local Habitation gets a little closer every day, as this page on the Penguin Group website can attest. It's still weird and wonderful and a little terrifying to look at websites and go "wait, that's my book, I wrote that, oh whoa, that's Toby." I am assured this feeling will eventually pass. I'm...not sure I want it to.

3. If you want to see me compared to an Emma Frost-esque diamond golem, click here and join the giggling. I don't object to being a golem, or being made out of diamond, and I admit it, my productivity is occasionally terrifying even to me. I am also assured that this phase in my life will eventually pass. That idea scares me.

4. Things about this weekend that I'm really excited about: the first holiday party of the season. Getting more time to work on Blackout. The premiere of the Alice miniseries on Syfy. It's by the people who did Tin Man last year, and while it doesn't star Zooey Deschanel (a definite minus if you ask me), it looks absolutely incredible. Plus it has Connor from Primeval, and he is mad hot.

5. Matt Fraction has declared that Emma Frost is the love of Scott Summers's life. Matt Fraction is my new favorite person, at least for right now.

Tonight, I'm going out with my cousins to do something mysterious which required me to buy two rolls of quarters from the bank. I am wary but interested to learn what lies in store on the misty streets of San Francisco. Here's hoping you're planning for a wonderful weekend of your own, and feel free to let me know what you have going on!

Saturday, I participated in LitCrawl at Borderlands Books in San Francisco. When I mentioned this on Twitter, someone said this made them think of ArtCrawl from The Middleman, and asked if I was going to perform "Hey, Mr. God," supposedly the world's worst spoken-word piece (also from The Middleman, naturally). Being a deeply silly blonde, I replied that if Rosemary and Rue was Borderlands' top-selling paperback again for October 2009, I would not only perform "Hey, Mr. God," I would record it as an MP3 and put it up for free download.

Sadly, I made this reply in public. So here, because I am a shameless creature, is the official challenge:

If enough people buy Rosemary and Rue from Borderlands to make it their top-selling mass-market paperback for October 2009, I will go into Kristoph's studio and record an MP3 of the "Hey, Mr. God" monologue from The Middleman episode "The Boy-Band Superfan Interrogation." I will then post this MP3 for free download. I will have no shame during the recording, which means I will sound like a complete idiot. You can probably use this MP3 to blackmail me in fifteen years, which I am less young and stupid.

(Yes, they take Internet and telephone orders; yes, they ship; yes, they have signed books.)

My plan is sheer elegance in its simplicity.

1. Sketched and started inking my third possible Borderlands bookmark. See, Borderlands Books in San Francisco does limited-edition bookmarks with interesting art on them, and—after my signing/book release party/circus sideshow earlier this month—they invited me to design one of the upcoming bookmarks. As is so often the case when I am paralyzed by choice, I said "screw it," and am doing multiple bookmark designs for them to choose from. The first one, involving clownfish mermaids, is completely done; the second, involving seahorse mermaids, is in rough pencils with some inks; now, so is the third, involving Allomai and a fuck-ton of ribbons. I find this soothing and infuriating and an excuse to buy more art supplies. Everybody wins.

2. Bought the new Kelley Armstrong book, Frostbitten. This was sort of a comedy of errors, since the guy at Borders hadn't put it on the shelves yet, but had put it on the "we're putting this on shelves" cart, which meant there were no copies in the back of the store. I eventually located the cart, thus locating my book, and money was exchanged, rather than bloodshed.

3. Read the new Kelley Armstrong book, Frostbitten. What? I read fast. Also, it was so awesome I couldn't put it down. I love Kelley Armstrong's work so much.

4. Watched the final episode of season three of Primeval, the second-to-last episode of season one of Warehouse 13, and two more of the audition episodes for the current season of So You Think You Can Dance. A few people have informed me that they don't believe I watch as much television as I say I do. To them I say: you're probably right. I think I watch substantially more.

5. Sort of accidentally knocked out a thousand words on Deadline, which will get included in the next word count post, because I'm feeling too lazy to bother with doing that much math right now.

How about you?

1) The new Kelley Armstrong comes out tomorrow! Frostbitten [Amazon]|[Mysterious Galaxy] is the tenth book in her Women of the Otherworld series, and the fourth (!) to feature Clayton and Elena. Now, Elena's not my favorite narrator—that honor is reserved for Paige, with Jaime coming in a close second—but her books are always exciting reads, and Armstrong definitely knows how to tell a story. I'm super-excited (and not just because she gave me a kick-ass cover blurb).

2) Oh, wow! Is it finally time for the major publisher hardcover edition of David Wong's John Dies at the End [Amazon]|[Mysterious Galaxy]?! It so totally is! John Dies at the End started as an Internet serial, became a limited-run paperback from Permuted Press, and is now a glorious hardcover packed with horror, comedy, excitement, and the dreaded soy sauce. I love this book. Now you can actually own it. You're so lucky.

3) Dexter is back! Glorious, glorious, amazing Dexter. Michael C. Hall, how you fulfill me.

4) Actually, while I'm talking TV, here are all the other shows I follow that are back on the air (presented in alphabetical order, for the sake of my sanity): America's Next Top Model, Big Bang Theory, Bones, Castle, Fringe, Glee, NCIS, Numb3rs, So You Think You Can Dance, and Supernatural. Basically, I am awash in televised goodness.

5) Whip It comes out on Friday. I have to say, there is no bad in a world that can combine Ellen Paige with roller derby. No bad at all. Hopefully, it'll take the nasty taste of the recent Fame remake out of my mouth.

So that's what I'm excited about this week. What are you excited about?

1. I am about to head off for some fairly major full-anesthesia dental surgery. Why does this matter to you? This matters to you because my computer and my bed are in the same room, and it's entirely possible that I'll roll out from under the covers and decide to be...interactive. Please ignore any...interaction...for the next twenty-four hours, as I will be recovering from sedation, and know not what I say.

2. Alice woke me up by hopping onto my chest and trilling in my ear, only to run like the wind as soon as I showed signs of movement. Behold the sensibility and calm of the teenage Maine Coon.

3. The fall TV season is getting blessedly underway. I, for one, welcome the return of our Winchester overlords. Mmm, Sam and Dean. Actually, just mmm, Dean. How I've missed you. Never leave me like this again.

Mom just showed up to get me to the dentist, so these quick notes are even quicker than originally intended. In the meanwhile, drop by jimhines's place to see the LEGO HORROR CASTLE ZOMG.

That is all.

10. I will be on a plane for San Diego in a little over twenty-four hours, on my way to the San Diego International Comic Convention. The SDCC is one of my favorite conventions, because it is, for all the chaos, really remarkably relaxing. I go, I smile, I speak, I shop. And shop, and shop, and oh, yes, shop. I love flea markets, and the SDCC dealer's hall is like the world's best combination of "the comic book store" and "the indoor flea market." Only this flea market has an artist's alley. Life is good.

9. As part of my preparation for San Diego, I took my mother for a pedicure last night. (There's logic here, I swear. The logic is largely "I didn't want to walk home after getting my nails done.") Neither of us is much of a pedicure girl, but sometimes it's nice to just let somebody attack your heels with a pumice stone. Besides, I have super-cute shoes for the parties in San Diego—kitten-heeled green Italian leather—and they require having super-cute toenails to go with them.

8. Alice woke me up five minutes before my alarm by kneading the hell out of my hip, and then throwing herself down across me like a fuzzy blue blanket possessed of most imposing puffiness. This was far, far more pleasant than being woken by the actual alarm could possibly have been, and made hauling my carcass out of bed much easier. After the Blue Team decided to let me get up, that is. Between the two of them, I really don't get to do much that my cats don't approve of.

7. Next up in my reread of the collected works of Stephen King: The Stand. This is one of my five favorite books of all time. Just having it in my purse makes me happy. (Not as happy as IT, which is why IT is slated for rereading at the end of August/beginning of September, but surprisingly close.)

6. According to this week's new releases list, the next volume of the collected hardcover Creepy comes out tomorrow. (Ironically, I won't be able to pick it up until next week, since, well, San Diego, but just knowing that it's on the trucks makes me happy.) These books are basically my childhood in handy, easy-to-shelve form, and their very existence enhances the universe incredibly. I am a happy girl.

5. Rosemary and Rue comes out in forty-one days. Forty-one is the thirteenth smallest prime number. (The next is forty-three, with which it comprises a twin prime.) It is also the sum of the first six prime numbers (2 + 3 + 5 + 7 + 11 + 13), and the sum of three primes (11 + 13 + 17). I love forty-one for being prime, and I love Wikipedia for knowing all this crap.

4. I have a hula hoop! And when I get home tonight, I get to use my hula hoop! I get to stand in the front yard and hula like I've never hula'd before. Well, actually, just like I hula'd last night, only maybe a little bit better, because I've had more practice. I can't take my hula hoop to San Diego, so I have to get my hula in now, while I still can.

3. Rebecca has BPAL waiting for me in San Diego. Specifically, Rebecca has a fresh bottle of Bad Luck Woman Blues (basically my signature aromatherapy calm down Seanan, you can't unleash the pandemic perfume) and a bottle of the new Zombie Apocalypse scent. I am a lucky girl.

2. I have season one of Leverage on DVD. Tonight, I will sit on my couch, ink art cards, and watch con men, thieves, and grifters as they do their con man, thief, and grifter things, and my cats will purr, and the DDP will be cold, and the tomato sandwiches will be incredibly drippy and get all over the damn place, probably causing at least one incident with my art supplies, and life will be good.

...and finally...

1. I am healthy, I have a cute haircut, I have orange toenails, I have a book coming out in less than a month and a half, I have wonderful friends, I have beautiful cats, and I'm about to take off for the world's biggest comic book convention. Life doesn't suck.

How's by you?

Today (May 21st) is National Memo Day—the day when we celebrate the memos of the world, both written, unwritten, and really rather needing to be written. In honor of this most honored of days, I present some truly vital memos.

***

To the fall television schedule:

Because you have given me a third season of Chuck and a second season of Fringe, I will let you live. But don't think I'm going to forget that you took Cupid and The Eleventh Hour away from me. I was only just starting to forgive you for Freakylinks, and now you pull this? Uncool, television, uncool. I've got my eye on you. Play nice or prepare to taste my wrath.

***

To Wild Republic:

While I appreciate the ongoing diversity and awesomeness of your Cuddlekins plush collection, I am afraid I have to point out that there are still dinosaurs available in England that I can't get here in North America, and that this is still not okay with me. I need more herbivores! My collection of meat-eaters is starting to look at me funny. Really, since I probably account for a large percentage of your annual sales, shouldn't you be placating me more?

***

To Emily Stone:

Best of luck in your new endeavors. Hack/Slash won't be the same without you.

***

To Lilly and Alice:

I love you. You know that I love you. I love you more than I love almost anything. And if you decide to have another wrestling match on my face at two o'clock in the morning, I'm going to replace you with taxidermy. Soft, fluffy, interesting to look at, does not try to claw me open in the night.

***

To Jane, my alcoholic and emotionally unstable muse:

I do not need to know what happens in the ninth Toby book. Please go drink a pint of absinthe, hook up with a hottie from an under-occupied pantheon, and leave me alone for a little while. I refuse to be responsible for the consequences if you don't.

***

Anybody got any memos?

Item the first: at least four—yes, four, which is a number higher than two, so yay—reviewers/bookstores have received their ARCs of Rosemary and Rue, along with the snazzy watercolor cards that Alice so helpfully "helped" me finish. Thank you, Alice. Thank you so very, very much. (As an Alice-related sub-item, my puffy Halloween ball of trouble turned twenty weeks old yesterday, and celebrated her failure to get sucked into the vacuum cleaner by falling off the cat tree. Again. Maine Coons, unlike boa constrictors, have gravity.)

Item the second: Mercedes Lackey and Larry Dixon will not be attending BayCon this year, due to being really, really sick. Nobody's dying, I don't have all the details, and also, I didn't do it. If I were going to start the pandemic, there are other people I'd target first, and I'd have published my cackling manifesto by now. "Yay, swine flu!" does not count as a cackling manifesto, it counts as a really weird idea of what constitutes entertainment.

Item the third: speaking of entertainment, Kate and I watched the season finales for two of our season-pass shows last night—America's Next Top Model and Fringe. (Never let it be said that I am ashamed of my taste in anything.) One of the girls on this season of ANTM was totally a Toby-universe Daoine Sidhe, I swear. Real people aren't supposed to have ElfQuest eyes, but she somehow managed to pull it off. I will miss you, freaky alien-elf-eyed girl! Although I won't miss the nightmares you gave me about Toby tracking me down with a pair of pliers and a smile!

Item the fourth: So You Think You Can Dance returns to television tomorrow night. In supposedly unrelated news, I'm getting ready to get back to work on Discount Armageddon. Hmmmm...

Item the fifth: Dawn Metcalf to the white courtesy phone, dawn_metcalf to the white courtesy phone. It has now been forty-eight hours, and I still don't have a mailing address for you. If I don't hear from you within the next twenty-four hours, I will be choosing a new winner for the signed cover flat of Rosemary and Rue. In actually related news, the poetry contest to win an ARC of Rosemary and Rue is still going. Please drop by and vote, if you haven't already.

Item the sixth: I am still the Rain King.

Well, let's see. So far today, I've...

...processed buckets of edits for Discount Armageddon, which I'm planning to get back to work on real soon now. I spent a few hours last night picking stealthcello's brain about competition-level ballroom and tango dancing (hint: it's complicated stuff), and I now feel much more equipped to write the next chapter, which involves an Argentine tango competition, Verity in a very skimpy dress, and, yes, knives. Almost any chapter that involves Verity involves knives. She's comfortably predictable that way.

...received a new blurb for Rosemary and Rue, resulting in squealing and jubilation. I am so seriously stoked about the blurbs I've managed to collect so far, all of which are wonderful and perfect and totally different. It's like kittens. No two kittens are alike, but as soon as they're your kittens, they become the most magical, wonderful things ever to wander across the face of the planet. I like kittens.

...also received the second icon and first wallpaper for the Rosemary and Rue promo set. All icons and wallpapers in this set are being designed by the ineffable taraoshea, who is really a goddess of graphic design. I am totally ecstatic, and can't wait to make them public for your enjoyment and (hopeful) use. Remember, nothing says 'love' like a blood-drenched San Francisco skyline!

...packed all pending pre-orders through 190, and signed and numbered through 200. So there's a max of 100 CDs left to go (I'm still taking increasingly mis-named 'pre-orders' via the website, because it's all about paying my engineer). If I finish the list before hitting 300, we'll just close out the pre-order run early, thus making the numbers even more surreal in future years. (Also creating the opportunity for funny, funny hoaxes on the part of inventive people with pens and copies of my CD.)

...watched two more episodes of my crazy Australian mermaid show.

What's up with you?

According to my big list* of holidays, today is a holiday that's very near and dear to my heart. Not quite as near and dear as Virus Appreciation Day (October 3rd), Waiting For The Barbarians Day (November 4th), or Cuckoo Warning Day (June 21st), but still both near and dear.

Today is Australia Day.

Today we celebrate the fact that Australia exists, the fact that Australia is full of things that want to make us all die, and the fact that Australia pretty much hates the human race. Specific things to celebrate about Australia include venomous snakes, spiders the size of dinner plates, marsupials, really interesting money, the koala (which will totally rip your face off if you poke at it), and the cone snail, which is the size of a man's thumb and can kill you extremely dead. This is why you do not fuck around with the native wildlife of Australia.

Tonight I will continue my celebration by watching several episodes of H2O: Just Add Water, an Australian teen sitcom about three girls who wind up in the wrong place at the wrong time and wind up getting turned into mermaids. It sounds incredibly twee, but even Chloe -- the wuss of the group -- would kick Hannah Montana's ass without so much as breaking a nail. In Australia, even the kiddie TV can kill you. And next year, I'll celebrate Australia Day by actually going to Melbourne, Australia, for the glory of WorldCon.

Thank you for existing, Australia! Today is your day. Your venomous, deadly, kicking-your-ass, being eaten by koalas day.

Hooray Australia!

(*I seriously have a holiday for every single day of the year, and sometimes more than one. Because the world needs more to celebrate.)

10. I appear to have started doing art cards. (Because, as Brooke said, I need something to do with all that spare time that I had just lying around.) For those of you who are unfamiliar with the art card 'concept,' they're little pieces of original artwork, done on 2.5"x3.5" cards. Mine are Micron and Prismacolor on bristol paper. I've done three so far, one to go with Grants Pass, one to go with Ravens in the Library, and one of Velveteen and Sparkle Bright during their first year with the JSP. I figure I'll use them as book giveaways. Right now, they're just being colorful and soothing; two things that I need more of in my life.

9. My reboot on Late Eclipses of the Sun appears to have done exactly what I was hoping it would do; the new first chapter is about ten times stronger, faster, better, and generally bionic in all possible regards. Now I'm working on the revisions to chapter two, just to really lock down the changes to the continuity, and once that's done, I can start processing my editor's notes on An Artificial Night. I'm spending so much time with Toby these days that we should really start charging her rent, I swear.

8. I write more poetry than is strictly healthy, sometimes in batches of two to five hundred poems at a time. (These batches are called 'Iron Poet' rounds, and are a variation on a standard writer's workshop exercise. They make me happy. I may be crazy.) I managed to write five poems yesterday, including a counted devan (although I skipped the internal rhymes on the zipper, because I didn't feel like giving myself a migraine) and a counted technical terza rima. Take that, everyone who said there was no use for structured poetry in the modern world!

7. My story in Ravens In the Library is getting an accompanying illustration. This is...this is amazing. Not just because the illustration itself is amazing -- I saw the sketch, and it is -- but because I didn't expect an illustration at all. It made me cry. More and more, I begin to believe that 2009 is the universe giving me one big incredible birthday present.

6. It's not entirely visible to the naked eye, but my website continues to creep closer and closer to being entirely done. We should be getting the first few essays up there soon, and Chris is working on the functionality that will allow me to update and edit the front page all on my lonesome. Meanwhile, Tara works secretly behind the scenes on Wonderful Surprises that only a golden graphics girl could possibly provide. Prepare to be amazed.

5. I get to spend the weekend working on Discount Armageddon! (Quoth Dan: "I don't know anybody who gets as excited about being told what to work on as you do.") I love deadlines, I love directions, and I love Verity. She's so happy to see you. And so happy to kick you in the head. Pleasantly, I just put together my Verity playlist last night, consisting almost entirely of dance music and things with a BPM of over 120. Because Verity just looooooves the beat, yo.

4. It's new comic book day! Always the most wonderful day of the week. At least in theory -- other days are sometimes surprisingly awesome.

3. All my television is coming back on the air. I'm a huge TV freak. It's what lets me decompress after a hard day of working and writing and worrying about working and writing; it's also what I do with the other half of my concentration when I'm inking. (Most of the shows I watch are more verbal than visual, and have clear cues when I actually need to be paying attention to the screen.) I really appreciate the fact that the things I watch are staggered enough to make sure I almost always have something new.

2. This time next week, I will be heading for the airport, heading for the sky, and heading for Seattle, baby.

...and the number one good thing about today...

1. Oasis just called me, and THE CDS ARE DONE!!!!! They're mailing them out from the Oasis warehouse today, and they should supposedly hit my doorstep on Friday. This gives me time to actually arrange for CDs to reach Seattle, prep the first batch of pre-orders to mail out (probably the first twenty or so, more if I can possibly swing it), and generally get my hysteria out of the way. It also gives me time to use the CD boxes to build myself a little fort and crawl inside it to hide from the universe.

What's new and awesome in the world of you?

Step one: Get off work. Go to Target. Buy microwave lunches for the next week, because Target is the only damn store in the damn Bay Area that reliably carries the kinds that I'll actually eat. Is it so hard for Safeway to keep Chicken Mirabella, Shrimp Marinara, and Tuna Casserole on their shelves? Apparently, yes. Yes, it is. (I'm only willing to eat like four kinds of microwave meal, and even I eventually get tired of spaghetti.)

Step two: Go to the comic book store. Engage an annoying patron in a vigorous discussion of why, perhaps, declaring "Fuck the Gemworld!" in a store containing, well, me, is not the world's very best idea. Amuse the counter monkeys immensely. The counter monkeys like me, as I am reliable, polite, and very, very addicted to comics. The counter monkeys have no such fondness for annoying patron, hereby referred to as 'the cat-toy.' The cat-toy survived our encounter, but did not linger.

Step three: Go home. Set the kitchen on fire making cranberry sauce.

Step four: Put out the fire.

Step five: Read Hack/Slash while eating dinner. After the dinner part of the program is done, ink and watch two episodes of Big Bang Theory (season one). Mr. Memory and The Human Labyrinth are now fully inked, as is the masthead. Most of the Ragnaroctopus still needs to be finished. But I found my zip-a-tone, so all will be well.

Step six: Process the final edits for my Grants Pass story, which is pleasant and nice and not at all disturbing.

Step seven: Muck around with my clicky Vampire Wars game on Facebook. Damn you, Jennifer, damn you.

Step eight: Make this entry.

Step nine: Retreat to the back room for Leverage and more comic books.

Well, I'm finally feeling well enough to return to work, even though it means hauling my little blonde butt out of bed at 5:15 AM. The cats are, to put it bluntly, not amused. Lilly really has issues with the fact that my taking sick time doesn't mean I'm planning on staying home with her forever and always, amen. This is because Lilly is a freak.

I'm better than I was, although not one hundred percent; I was correct in assuming that my failure to develop a proper fever meant that I wasn't dealing with strep, and instead had 'just' a sort throat. There's very little 'just' about losing the capacity to swallow, but I'll take what I can get when it keeps me off the magic antibiotic happy juice. That stuff just knocks me out of the game for as long as it's in my system. NO LOGIC ALLOWED.

I've put my unexpected time away from work to good use, doing a lot of editing, a lot of inking, and a lot of catching up on my stock-piled television. I've now seen the entire first season of ReGenesis, aka 'Canadian television is trying to buy my love, and I think it just might be for sale.' Look, any show that's willing to give me smallbox-Marburg chimera diseases (I love chimera diseases) and have the balls to go for the Spanish flu? That show is basically going to own me for as long as it likes. Sadly, ReGenesis only wants to own me for four seasons. Alas, Babylon.

So now that I'm emerging from my viral hibernation, what have I missed? Assume that the world was just trundling on without me for the past three days.

Well, I'm home sick today, currently presenting two out of the five primary symptoms of streptococcal sore throat. (Quoth my mother, "Honey, you are the only person I know who says 'Mommy, I've got strep' by announcing that you're presenting primary symptoms of something I can't pronounce.") Big fun for the whole family! For the morbidly curious, I'm feeling deeply unwell, have marked swelling of the throat and tonsils, difficulty swallowing, tender lymph nodes, and so much red inflammation that I look like one of my own manuscripts post-editing pass. Not much fun.

In an effort to make myself feel better, I've been catching up on some of the television that's been building up while I was off doing other things, like writing, editing, and attempting to have a life. Well, let's see. How about The Eleventh Hour? Crazy science always makes me feel better! Yeah! And this episode is about...

...smallpox getting loose in Philadelphia. Right. Well, now that I'm sick and deeply disturbed, what about watching some ReGenesis? Originally created for Canadian television, ReGenesis really seems to have been created with me in mind, since it's sort of a crazy cross between Numb3rs and House, only instead of fighting either crime or weird medicine, they fight genetic crime and monstrosities of science. ReGenesis will make me feel better! And the first episode of season one is about...

...a horrible hybrid of camel pox and Ebola getting loose in Canada. Right.

I'm going back to bed.

Kate has a standing rule that I am not allowed to own anything which has appeared on the BBC show Primeval, wherein cute British scientists chase dinosaurs that have emerged into the present day through holes in the fabric of space and time. I think this proves that Kate is mean to me. Everyone else thinks this proves that Kate is a very smart woman who deserves a higher pay grade.

Last week's episode (which we watched last night) featured a saber-toothed tiger rampaging through an amusement park. This made me happy. This made Kate leery of my inevitable demand for one of my own. Finally...

"Can I--"
"No."
"But--"
"No."
"But--"
"Is it on this show? If it's on this show, you can't have it."

I attempted logic:

"They have grass on this show."

I should not attempt to use logic against Kate:

"And that's why you're not allowed to have a lawn."

Kate and her mighty hammer of logic: all that saves the world from dinosaur devastation on a daily basis. You can thank her later. And remember, she does take bribes.

...I learned from Marilyn Munster.

There is nothing wrong with being a little bit unusual. * It doesn't matter what other people think about what you love; it's what you think that really matters. * It's okay to be the blonde one sometimes. * Monsters are people, too. * Being black and white doesn't mean you can't be pink inside. * Loyalty counts. * The people who really care about you will continue to care, no matter how much of a freak you are. * Start every day with a smile. * There is magic in the petulant head-tilt. * Always run towards the explosions. * If everyone is screaming, things are probably about to get interesting. * You can hide lots of knives in a ruffled gown. * No one gets to define what's normal for you. * Stereotypes are funny. * Life is good, so enjoy it while you can. * Other people's prejudices are not actually your problem. * Some people only see appearances. It's best to feel sorry for them. * When someone leads an angry mob to your doorstep, it's okay to scold them for carrying lit torches in a residential area. * Be comfortable with your surroundings. * It is perfectly possible to be a horror movie girl while wearing pastels. * White pancake makeup is totally optional. * Blood is actually good for hair; it strengthens the follicles. * Never underestimate the power of big blue eyes. * Or having a seven foot tall uncle who looks like he was raised from the dead. That doesn't hurt either. * Family counts for everything. * Running in high heels is a life skill. * Hydrogen peroxide gets blood out of almost anything but taffeta and white cotton. * A good wardrobe is key. * Be yourself. In the end, that's what actually matters.

What important lessons did you learn from your personal media icons?

Yesterday, I...

...got official sign-off to turn in An Artificial Night to my publisher. This means that the entire first trilogy has now been turned in, and I can focus (at least for a few days) on the process of prepping the second trilogy, starting with Late Eclipses of the Sun. I'm deeply excited about this. I have a finished rough draft of Late Eclipses, and about half of The Brightest Fell, but Ashes of Honor is an entirely unfamiliar country. I hope my passport photo doesn't make me look like an idiot.

...finished processing some full-body machete-shot edits to Late Eclipses of the Sun, resulting in my needing a cold shower and the book needing some serious medical attention (the big baby). There's still a lot of work to be done, but the overall shape and structure of things is getting cleaner by the day, and by the draft. I'd estimate that I have maybe two or three passes through left to go before I can file it and get to work on book five. Book five lives in fear. Book five has every reason to be afraid.

...finished the next Velma Martinez installment, 'Velveteen vs. The Flashback Sequence, Part I.' (Technically, that means I need to write the second part of the story still, and I'm direly afraid that it's going to develop a third part, but we take what accomplishments we can get.) I've finally had the opportunity to fully introduce The Junior Super Patriots, West Coast Division. Velma 'Velveteen' Martinez, David 'The Claw' Mickelstein, Yelena 'Sparkle Bright' (no last name released by her handlers), and Aaron 'Action Dude' Frank. As a lifetime comic book girl, it's incredibly awesome to have the excuse to taunt the things I love.

...fully outlined my story for Grants Pass, after realizing that I was trying to write it from the wrong point of view. Yes, again. Only this time, I was in first when I really needed to be in third. (It seems that my novel default is first, and my short story default is third. I do not know why this is, only that it is.) I am a happy girl, full of pep and the love of horrible pathogens.

...watched an enormous amount of television.

Now we shall have victory cake and Diet Dr Pepper, for no other libation could properly match this victory. VICTORY!

So I was asked today how I could possibly watch as much television as I claim, given how much I write. The implication was, of course, that I'm exercising hyperbole in my description of my television-viewing habits. So, in the interests of full disclosure, here are the shows that I currently watch:

* America's Next Top Model. Not only do I have no shame, I enjoy watching -- and mocking -- Tyra's slow descent into madness. I seriously think she's been eating lead paint for the last five years, or something. It's soothing reality madness. Kate and I get together once a week to mock it.

* Bones. Hot actors, snappy dialog, and dead stuff. Really, I am a simple creature, easily brought over to the cause of darkness by offers of dead stuff.

* Dexter. I loved the first two seasons, I loved the first two books. I hated the third book, so now I'm praying that the show's departure from the text continues in a big, big way. I want to stay in love with my show. I really, really do.

* Eureka. Mad science? I am so there.

* Fringe. I haven't actually seen the first episode yet -- that's happening tomorrow -- but I'm planning on watching at least the first month, just to figure out whether or not I want to make a commitment.

* Heroes. I'm still catching up on the end of season two, but I'm primed and ready for season three. No spoilers, please!

* NCIS. Nothing says 'love' like perky goth forensic technicians who can kill you and leave behind absolutely no evidence to indicate that they did it. I love this show. It has guns.

* Numb3rs. Math and hot mathematicians and more guns and it's basically just the happiest hour on television that doesn't feature dinosaurs.

* Primeval. The happiest hour on television that does feature dinosaurs.

* Supernatural. This show was actually designed especially for me. It's fantastic that they're somehow prying it out of my dreams and putting it on cable for everyone else to see, but really, they made this show just to make me happy. Which it does, reliably.

* True Blood. Only one episode so far, but man, am I digging what I'm getting. I hope it maintains or improves on this quality level; if it does, it's going to be just amazing.

Shows I love, and watch religiously, but which are neither currently on the air or starting a season in the next month: Doctor Who, Torchwood, The Sarah Jane Adventures, The Middleman. Shows which I love, and watch religiously, but which are finishing their seasons: Monk, Psych. So yes, I watch a lot of television.

How about you?

Hello, and welcome to my journal! I'm pretty sure you know who I am, my name being in the URL and all, but just in case, I'm Seanan McGuire, and you're probably not on Candid Camera. This post exists to answer a few of the questions that I get asked on a semi-hemi-demi-regular basis (currently, approximately every two months). It may look familiar; that's because it gets reposted every time the answers change, and to let new people know how we roll around here. (I will make no more Clueless references in this post, I promise.) Also, sometimes I change the questions. Because I can.

If you've read this before, feel free to skip, although there may be interesting new things to discover and know beyond the cut.

Anyway, here you go:

( This way lies a lot of information you may or may not need about the person whose LJ you may or may not be reading right at this moment. Also, I may or may not be the King of Rain, which may or may not explain why it's drizzling right now. Essentially, this is Schrodinger's cut-tag.Collapse )