Seanan McGuire (seanan_mcguire) wrote,
Seanan McGuire
seanan_mcguire
  • Mood: exanimate
  • Music: Steeleye Span, "Tam Lin."

Oh, home, why do I ever leave you?

Thomas met us at the door last night, tail puffed out, already singing the song of his people. Alice shunned me for about an hour, skittering from room to room, refusing to let me look her in the eye. When she settled, she announced it by crawling on top of me and purring for an hour solid, making it impossible to sleep.

Home.

I always think, when I'm traveling, that I'll come in the door and be stunned by how much stuff I have amassed. "I'm finally going to see the mess for what it is, and be able to get rid of half of it with no regrets," I think, and then I get into my room, and crawl into the mass of plush toys that is my bed, like a Pokemon into long grass, and I remember that this is why I have so much stuff: because it defines the borders of my space. It claims the space in a way that is very precious to me. It's not careless clutter. It's careful assertion of my right to exist, safely, in this space.

Home.

I am so tired that I can feel my bones, and I'm working my way through a dozen slow to-do lists, some of them time-sensitive, others that just need to be accomplished. I am where I belong, at least for a little while, at least until I have to leave again.

Home.

There's no place I'd rather be.
Tags: alice, contemplation, thomas, utterly exhausted
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  • 31 comments

wispfox

April 16 2015, 21:00:26 UTC 2 years ago

Welcome home!

kdsorceress

April 16 2015, 22:36:19 UTC 2 years ago

Fancy meeting you here!

And to Seanan...this post really resonates with me! I love the determination of "clutter-as-proof-of-home", and I am very fond of the idea of a bed filled with plush things --mine tends to look rather like that as well, whenever I have the luxury to make it thus.

~Sor