thoughtful(Not for everyone, naturally. I know people who adore spoilers, and find them an exciting roadmap to what's ahead. I am just as likely to go "welp, that was the greatest hits version of the story, let's go enjoy something new.")
But saying "spoilers are bad" and "spoilers are wrong" seems very...I don't know, privileged? At least to me. I have friends who cannot watch rape. Cannot watch any threat of sexual violence. Cannot handle the use of date rape drugs or other such devices in fiction. I know people who are so severely afraid of spiders that even spiders in movies are not safe for them, or who can't deal with certain forms of bodily harm (eyeballs, sure, but no fingers, no teeth...). Most, if not all, of these people have really good reasons for their fears, and if they don't go around wearing shirts that list them off for your comprehension and enlightenment, that's because it's nobody else's business.
So they seek out spoilers. They look for them everywhere, because a little loss of surprise is worth it for the comfort of knowing a piece of media is safe. I was lucky enough to see Thor 2 early (I love you, Disneyland Annual Pass), and while I refused, for the most part, to be a source of spoilers, one person asked me a very basic "this thing will be triggery for me, does this thing happen" question, and got an answer. Because my desire not to put spoilers out into the world is not stronger than someone else's need for mental peace. I knew why she was asking. Refusing to answer at that point would have been policing someone else's choices, and saying I knew what she needed better than she did.
I will absolutely roll with "involuntary spoilers are bad": I don't want to get spoiled for everything in the universe the second I turn on my computer in the morning. I will roll with "there is a statute of limitations," and while we haven't all agreed on what it is, I stop getting grumpy after a week or so for minor things (it takes longer for big, shocking, "this changes everything" revelations). But we have to remember that for some people, spoilers are safety and self-defense. Spoilers are what makes it possible for them to enjoy media, just like everybody else.
Sometimes, providing spoilers is the only kind thing to do.
December 12 2013, 18:17:37 UTC 3 years ago
How interesting. I totally get where you go with that, and I agree. Frankly, if someone is literally WANTING spoilers, for whatever reasons including the ones you list, I think that's fine. That's a private contract between the person who NEEDS/wants to be spoiled and the person delving out the info.
But the reason your comment made me do a double-take is because when I read Wendig's post and then a post from Lisa Manchev that sort of countered it, I came up with the realization that people telling spoiler-phobes to stay off the internet are very.... PRIVILEGED.
Because like you said, "not everyone can go to every opening night, watch every show the second it airs, read every book in ARC form three months before publication." And for those people who've already watched it and want to bombast their discussions all over facebook or twitter or whatnot to turn around and tell everyone else to stay off the internet, that's a load of privileged bull. Because being able to watch these things opening night, or the day it airs, or read/see it early is a privilege. So is having the internet, for that matter, but the internet and facebook and twitter and ALL THESE THINGS are such a regular, daily part of our lives (how many people have push notifications turned on, etc?) that being told to just stay off the internet is just..... gah! It'd be one thing if a person was visiting forums/websites on the very thing they don't want to be spoiled on and then getting MAD over seeing spoilers (in that case, staying away from those sites is a perfectly valid and logical comeback), but to just stay off the entire internet, when now even news publications seem to think that whether or not this character kissed that character on a television show is newsworthy? Come on.....
Anyway, I just totally took your point and ran in a completely opposite direction. I'm not arguing it at all: rather, I love your point, and it's a great angle I hadn't considered in the discussion on spoiler wars (which is, in and of itself, a privileged discussion). I don't like spoilers, but that doesn't mean if someone asks me for them specifically that I won't divulge. I've also asked for spoilers on occasion, not for triggery reasons so much as wanting to know if something is worth still investing in.
December 12 2013, 23:26:24 UTC 3 years ago
Not to mention that sometimes not even staying off the Internet will spare you; some years ago, at a U.S. science-fiction convention that took place shortly after the British airing of the Torchwood episode "Children of Earth", I got to see the 500-pound Spoilerzilla parading around on T-shirts, buttons, flyers, and petitions--before BBC America had even had a chance to run the episode.
December 13 2013, 00:58:26 UTC 3 years ago
My hubby was spoiled at work for something on either BREAKING BAD or MAD MEN because he happened to have his headphones out while sitting at his desk and some co-workers were talking about the show near him. :-/
Stay off the internet, my ass.....
December 13 2013, 18:37:49 UTC 3 years ago
December 13 2013, 19:32:56 UTC 3 years ago
December 17 2013, 01:34:50 UTC 3 years ago
Incidentally, Peter Capaldi's role has a story-perfect, yet horribly triggering resolution as well. It's right for the story, but I don't like that story very much any more.