In which Seanan actually sort of defends Miley Cyrus.: seanan

In which Seanan actually sort of defends Miley Cyrus.

So the VMAs (Video Music Awards) happened last night, and Miley Cyrus did a thing. It was...well, it was not a good thing. She's making creative choices that I don't necessarily agree with or understand, and I sort of wish she'd put her tongue back into her mouth. But these are not my choices to make, and since the state of her career doesn't really impact me in any rational way, I will do my best not to criticize her beyond "I really liked it better when you were doing awesome country music, Miley, and I hope you'll get back to that, because I'd love an album with you and your godmother singing together."

As part of the thing that Miley did, however, she wound up grinding her backside (and, due to her position at the time, her genital region) against Robin Thicke's groin while wearing spanky pants made of what looked like flesh-colored vinyl. No one missed a beat when she did this, including Robin Thicke, so I have to assume that it was rehearsed, and was part of the plan for the performance. Again, still not a good thing, but she didn't start throwing in the over-the-top sexual stuff on a whim: MTV approved this. Her backup dancers learned this. Robin Thicke voluntarily did this.

I have now heard three separate people say something along the lines of "Robin Thicke's wife should slap the shit out of her," and "she should be ashamed." What I'm not seeing, though, are people saying the equivalent things about him. It appears that, to many people, Robin Thicke just materialized on stage as an innocent bystander, where Miley Cyrus proceeded to grind on him, and he didn't push her away because he's a gentleman.

I...wait.

I know this is a weird example to use, but bear with me here: this is actually a really good demonstration of how we tend to treat female "characters" in both real life (celebrities, pop stars, people whose lives are turned into narratives by the media) and fiction. Belle stole Brina's boyfriend! Sharon is a skank! Cassandra is a coward! It's always the women who are to blame, and the men around them are blameless. It's not "Brian left Brina for Belle." It's not "Sharon had consensual sex with Steve." It's not "Connor threatened Cassandra's life and family, so she withdrew." We place the full onus for anything we don't like on the female participants, leaving nothing for their counterparts. And it's just not fair.

Miley Cyrus did a thing. Very few people seem to have liked the thing, and that's on her: she should know her audience better than that. But Robin Thicke did not accidentally wander into the performance. If there's blame to give here, it needs to go both ways.

We need to drop the double standard.

mandasthe_01

August 27 2013, 00:20:13 UTC 3 years ago

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You bring up a vital point here....the entire performance was rehearsed and approved in advance.

It took 5 writers to create Miley's new 'summer hit.' She had a director for her music video, and choreographers directing her performance. I doubt she had many opportunities for creative injection, but if she did--she definitely didn't utilize them properly.

Miley has had help with her new image. I want names.

seanan_mcguire

October 6 2013, 18:53:41 UTC 3 years ago

Me, too.

jaggedtoothgrin

August 27 2013, 01:27:15 UTC 3 years ago

just a few added comments on this:

there is indeed a double standard in play here, but in this instance, can we look at the fact that robin thicke is at this point a fairly established "sexy sexualisation sex sex" performer, and I would utterly expect to see some grinding and whatnot in his act. Miley, however, is still fighting to break through her Hannah Montana image.

so the shock and outrage directed at Miley is atleast in part, due to expectations.

should also point out that Thicke copped a lot of criticism for his video. He's already 'paid his dues' in the slut shaming circuit so to speak.

also, in regards to the "his wife should" etc comments. maybe it's not common knowledge, but in literally the one interview i heard with Thicke, he mentioned that he had wanted the song and its clip to be a sort of goofy fun "benny hill" type thing, and when the person directing the video clip (who, for the record, also a woman) was all "we should totally get the girls to drop some clothing" he insisted they still do two versions, incase the topless one was too sleazy. After this, he was planning on dropping the topless version saying he felt it was probably 'too much' and that it 'wasnt needed' , but his wife specifically talked him into releasing it, saying that it was Shit Hot, and that he needed to get it out there.

October 6 2013, 19:05:55 UTC 3 years ago

True. At the same time, the slutty slutty slut slut accusations are ALWAYS louder when hurled at women. People got mad at Thicke for seeming like a sleaze, not for having sexual desires.

l_o_lostshadows

August 27 2013, 01:45:19 UTC 3 years ago

Just tracked it down and watched it. Maybe it was the quality of the youtube video*, but that doesn't seem any worse than anything I remember from the vmas.

I saw Prince's assless pants performance back in 1991 (still my bar for tacky vma performances) and while I remember him getting flack for it, the general reaction was more an eyeroll than an attack. (Of course, the internet was less well established back then.)

*Doubtful.

October 6 2013, 19:06:05 UTC 3 years ago

Heh.

anne_d

August 27 2013, 02:56:18 UTC 3 years ago

I've only seen stills from the performance, but what struck me was how emaciated she looked. That worries me a lot more than the sexual content of her performance. I mean, it's MTV, what did people expect?

I feel very old. I remember seeing some of Kate Bush's videos from Hounds of Love on MTV the first time around. I think I'll go hide in my tower and growl down at passers-by for a while...

October 6 2013, 19:06:17 UTC 3 years ago

Good plan.

wfw_sj

August 27 2013, 03:12:41 UTC 3 years ago

Agreed. Also: (a) it was more funny than sexy, (b) it was play acting (that is, make pretend), (c) it didn't mean that much to me, and (d) these statements apply to all parties involved.

October 6 2013, 19:06:27 UTC 3 years ago

Yes.

avhn

August 27 2013, 06:08:57 UTC 3 years ago

There seems to be this view that adult men cannot make their own decisions about sex or relationships, and thus whenever a man does something his partner does not like, it is clearly another woman's fault. It is deeply disturbing to me on many levels (denial of men's agency, rigid binary gender roles, heterosexism, slut shaming, etc.)

Not to mention the fact that in this case others are deciding what the wife "must not like" based on their own expectations of relationships.

I also really wonder about how performances of race and wealth play into the judgement of Miley's performance. This article looks at Miley's appropriation of black culture, which I see as a more interesting and valuable critique than demonizing her on stage sexuality. I do wonder if the same appropriation is what's making main-stream media so much more upset about her on-stage-sexuality than other artists. Do we, as a culture, judge her more harshly because her sexuality is being expressed using non-stereotypically-white styles? I'm not sure, but it does make me wonder.

October 6 2013, 19:06:43 UTC 3 years ago

It's a very good question.

ex_naomi_ja

August 27 2013, 10:15:09 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you for articulating so perfectly what I've been trying to say for 24 hours.

October 6 2013, 19:06:52 UTC 3 years ago

Welcome.

vincentursus

August 27 2013, 10:17:43 UTC 3 years ago

Admittedly my reaction was to think of Miley as being the responsible one on the basis that I've never heard of this 'Robin Thicke' person before. Apparently he has some significance though.

October 6 2013, 19:07:02 UTC 3 years ago

Seems so.

adaptation

August 27 2013, 11:01:51 UTC 3 years ago

This is exactly how I feel about it, thank you for putting my feelings into words.

I didn't like her performance. But that had nothing to do with her grinding on Robin Thicke. She can grind on whoever she wants, as long as it's consensual. Except, you know, maybe choose better next time because Robin Thicke is gross because of reasons.

October 6 2013, 19:07:12 UTC 3 years ago

Agree.

Deleted comment

October 6 2013, 19:07:34 UTC 3 years ago

Those were way more disturbing, yet I didn't hear nearly as much critique.

cryptaknight

August 27 2013, 15:22:58 UTC 3 years ago Edited: August 27 2013, 15:27:01 UTC

On tumblr I've seen quite a bit about Robin Thicke, though that's been going on since "Blurred Lines" dropped, given the content of the song. But in general, yeah, I'd agree with you. Someone found an interview where he said, "What a pleasure it is to degrade women," and that's been making the rounds, but it's not specifically directed at the Miley incident.

I know for me, the problem with Miley isn't the sexuality in her performance, it's the cultural appropriation, the use of people of color as accessories. She's playing at being "ratchet" but gets to go home to life of rich white privilege, and she's commodified black women- in her performance she was smacking and grabbing her dancers' asses, while dressing them as animals. It's gross.

Plus, she's plain not good at what she's attempting. That was a sorry excuse for twerking, yet she's declared herself the queen of twerk (despite it being prevalent in the black community for decades).

ETA: I do want to add that I find it interesting that of the people that do have a problem with Blurred Lines and Thicke in general, only bring up Thicke, and not Pharrell or TI, who are also credited on the song. On tumblr, I've seen a lot of the same people that slam Thicke talking about how fine Pharrell looks, and I just wonder why he gets a pass.

October 6 2013, 19:08:09 UTC 3 years ago

The cultural appropriation is a huge issue, and Miley IS at fault. The insistence on pointing at her, screaming "SLUT!" is distracting from that issue.

apestyle

August 27 2013, 16:20:31 UTC 3 years ago

I promise that I'm not trying to derail, but I wonder if you had any thoughts of Miley and the charge of her weird cultural appropriation.

October 6 2013, 19:09:07 UTC 3 years ago

I think that there is some serious room for discussion there, and that Miley is clearly, if perhaps ignorantly, at fault.

That said, I am not an expert. I can't speak with any sort of authority or informed understanding, to that issue. I can just say "calling her a slut is distracting from what she actually did wrong."

wendyzski

August 27 2013, 18:48:01 UTC 3 years ago

I kind of felt bad for her. She's clearly trying soooo hard to get away from the Disney-girl image, and it just ended up as a huge steaming pile of WTF. But everyone there was at the rehearsals and at some point decided that it was at least an OK idea.

October 6 2013, 19:09:18 UTC 3 years ago

Yeah.

cerulean_sky

August 27 2013, 18:51:46 UTC 3 years ago

I honestly don't get why this is a big deal for people. She (and he) is an entertainer. Her job (and his) is to entertain you—and then get your money for having done so.

Also: no one gets all up in arms when two actors who aren't married to one another do a sex scene together. It's just entertainment!

October 6 2013, 19:24:53 UTC 3 years ago

Agreed.

gajastar

August 27 2013, 21:33:04 UTC 3 years ago

Robin Thicke has rubbed me the wrong way (no pun intended) since 2008, so I'm more than willing to cast blame all over his skeezy, rape song writing ass. *shudder*

October 6 2013, 19:25:00 UTC 3 years ago

legoline

August 28 2013, 06:28:57 UTC 3 years ago

A while ago when Kristen Stewart was caught having an affair with the director of her movie, people started calling her a "Homewrecker" and my mind just boggled. I didn't see her dragging him out of his house and forcing herself on him sexually. How did him cheating on his wife become Kristen Stewart's fault?

October 6 2013, 19:25:11 UTC 3 years ago

I do not know.

juliansinger

August 29 2013, 01:38:56 UTC 3 years ago

Like when Janet Jackson had her not-accident at the Super Bowl, and Justin Timberlake, her partner in the song and full participant in the process, was not blamed one whit. He was not just standing there, people! He was part of it!

So, yes. Very with you.

October 6 2013, 19:25:19 UTC 3 years ago

kaleidors

September 1 2013, 02:40:04 UTC 3 years ago

I don't know about the sexy aspect, but the solidarity is for Miley Cyrus article brings up some valid concerns for racism.

October 6 2013, 19:25:59 UTC 3 years ago

Jezebel not focusing at all on the appropriation when they're a major news source was inappropriate.

Saying "we should not slut shame people" is not inappropriate, and is not actually the same as saying "Miley was right to do what she did."

sunlessnick

September 7 2013, 23:46:21 UTC 3 years ago

I've not seen the performance, so I can't really comment on it. Like some others here, I've mostly seen criticism based on racism or racial/cultural appropriation - but it surprises me not at all to hear of slut-shaming.

Anyway, it's a good takedown.

October 6 2013, 19:26:09 UTC 3 years ago

Thanks.

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In which Seanan actually sort of defends Miley Cyrus.

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