Dear girls of the world today...

Last Wednesday I purchased a shirt for my 3 year old daughter that she picked out herself. Its orange, has a blue stegosaurus skeleton on it, and is awesome. She pestered me for two days to wear it and finally got the chance on Friday. I helped to put it on her and remarked how great it looks and she looked down at herself and stated proudly that she looked like a boy. Part of me just shriveled up and died inside hearing her say that. I asked why she thought she looked like a boy and she told me it was because the shirt was a boy shirt. My husband and I have worked really hard to not set any limits or preconceptions about what she could or could not like. After hearing her say something was a boy thing with such pride I just wanted to shout at the world, "Get the f*%k out of my daughters head!!" Instead I had to take a deep breath and tell her that its not a boy shirt and that she looks like a girl because she is one. Anyone can wear dinosaur shirts, I explained to her, and it didn't matter if your a girl or boy. I also told her that if they made one in my size I would wear it too. She was very happy with this.

Its a battle to raise a girl who is comfortable not being what everything around her is trying to tell her she should be. I want her to continue loving dinosaurs, trains, science, cars, space, and dragons.

Thank you for writing this. I will be sure to share it to her when she is older.

You can tell her that my mother, who was born in 1944, fell in love with dinosaurs at the ripe age of 9 and subsequently got the opportunity to study with paleontologist Samuel Knight at the University of Wyoming, got to work fossil digs, and got to reconstruct an oreodont skull one summer while she was still in high school (and got to keep it, too!) There is nothing unfeminine about dinosaur love! That's what my kids' Nana is all about, so it's obviously a Grandma thing!

(Just like I have a friend who grew up believing that all judges were women because of his mom. It's all in who you're exposed to.)

(Oh, and dragons? I've heard of dragons being the thing for girls who want to move beyond horses... ;) )

Every time I think you can't get more awesome, you prove me wrong. I hope you continue to do so.

Also, I know what hijacking is, and I'm not trying to do that, but everything you've said here is equally true for boys. I have two children of different genders and I'm going to read this post to both of them.

I love pink, but not as much as I love black. I collect swords, daggers, also collect antique tea cup sets. I read Stephen King, Dean Koontz and Harlan Coban books, I'm writing a book,I'm heavyset, bisexual, and have 7 tattoos, I love terrifying horror movies and cry at chick films, I'm a goth steampunk Senior citizen, I do not fit well into what others think I should be, I not only march to the beat of my own drummer, I have an entire drum line, and I AM A GIRL! Did I mention demur? Right!

Thank you for this - absolutely wonderful to be reminded that we certainly do not have to fit the "mold". (Also letting you know that I have reposted this with a link to your article.)

Thank you for writing this!

Thank you for this, and thank you for posting it today. I just got home a little while ago from a long shift at work. I spent my day being so stereotypically feminine that, to me, it almost qualifies as a drag performance. Not that every day at work requires it that much but today did. Enough so that I had to plan out, in excruciating detail, how to achieve that performance. It worked, and it paid off for today, and I can't say I regret it, but it was hard, so very hard.

I collect dolls, and knives, and books and interesting rocks. On my own time, I wear frills and lace, and denim and combat boots, sometimes all at once. I learned the lesson young, that there is only so much conforming to expectations that I am willing to do. That being me is more important than being whom society says I ought to be. That when men say "But you don't think/react like a fat chick," they actually mean it as a compliment, and not the insult it actually is, to women of any size.

So thank you, again, for putting this out there, as a reminder for people like me, that there are others, and for the people who have never heard that it's good to be who they are, so that maybe, they can be free to be whomever they actually are.

this made me tear up
and feel loved

thank you <33333

As much as I wish someone had said this to me when I was five (or eight, or ten, or...) it's gorgeous to see it now, no matter what.

Thank you.

And let us not forget that these messages at least start from the mouths of MEN who work hard to sure-up their control over the planet which includes the other gender of their species. By harassing us to have sex with us then calling us ho's for doing so. By forcing us to raise children we didn't want while they find a myriad of ways not to participate in process emotionally, spiritually or financially or the flipside making us totally dependent on them for our survival. Go back in the books of the three monotheist religions and note the importance that one's s.o. pop out at least one male offspring to be validated as a proper baby-factory.

I am not a lesbian or bi-sexual. I do like the cock. But I'm to the point any more that I only want it on a man's terms. I can f**k you, call you a ho and leave you out to dry. I want the control over my body not to have to bear your spawn. I want a job that I am paid the same as the man sitting next to me, doing the same job, gets paid. I want to play in the young, pretty, buff pool and not be called a man-eating cougar while my male counterpart is praised by his friends for bedding some <25, size 2.

Listening to the asshat last Sunday who tried to call Maddow a liar about equal pay, I wanted to bitch-slap him. Of course MALE managers/company owners will spend more to hire a MAN for the job because they still see us a brainless sluts and baby factories. More women need to man-up. Start their own manufacturing companies, scientific research companies, medical, engineering, architecture, etc and hire girls. If that's what we have to do to make it happen then let's do it.

I don't know you. I'm not sure how I found this. But this is the most awesome thing ever. Thank you. As a mix of super girly girl and geek and some things yet to be identified, THANK YOU. I have always thought, feminism is just being who you are.

When I got home from work yesterday, this post was exactly what I needed.

I was in a bookstore yesterday checking out the comic books, when a teenage girl joined me and we started chatting about various comics. After lingering in this section for about fifteen minutes, the group that she was with found her and immediately began picking at her for wanting to read about zombies. She'd been holding The Walking Dead compendium, and after their pressure, put it back and left looking horribly dejected. This was the same day that one of the kids that I work with reminded me that I needed to find a husband before I got too old and ugly for anyone to want to marry me. I think my heart broke a little. Seeing this post reminded me that there's hope.

I am going to print this out and give it to my daughter when she gets older. <3

I wish I had this to read when I was young. Instead I'll give it to my daughter.

Thank you for that!

Well said. I must have my daughter read that. Thanks... :)

The Weasel girl said to say thank you for this. So, thank you from the Weasel, and thank you from me, too.

You need to meet the Weasel. You'd LIKE the Weasel. She's a monster hunter after your own heart.

I love you for posting this, Seanan. You're an awesome woman and the girls of today need to keep hearing positive messages like this as often as possible. Bravo you!