Mass hysteria in smart people: toys aren't worth it.

Every year in July, I go to the San Diego International Comic Convention. It's huge, it's crowded, it's complicated, it's messy, and it's still, for all its faults, one of my favorite conventions (the other being OVFF). I love SDCC. I've been going since I was a teenager, and if the con has changed, well, so have I. I can be happy there. I feel like the rest of the world gets to wait a little while.

Which is not to say that the con is without its problems. One, that's been getting more extreme with every passing year, is the issue of THE COMICON EXCLUSIVE (dun-dun-DUUUUUN). These are toys made for and offered solely at the con. They can't be obtained anywhere else. There have been My Little Ponies, special perfumes from the Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab, and action figures, action figures, action figures. Oh, the action, oh the figures, without end. Collectors swarm the exhibit hall the second it opens, rushing to get the exclusives on their list.

I, it must be said, am no different. I went to SDCC 2011 with the following exclusives on my list: diamond form Bishojo Emma Frost, Waid-era Bishojo Susan Storm, the SDCC 2011 My Little Pony, and the Deadfast cosplay Ghoulia Yelps. I got there early on Wednesday, and hit the floor while the throngs were at their lowest pre-Sunday ebb, ready to stand in lines, fork over cash, and get my goodies. There is nothing wrong with being a collector of things. I have been a collector of things my whole life. Some of the things I collect now, I started collecting when I was four years old. Four years old. My ability to throw stones at collectors died a long damn time ago.

That being said, there are limits.

People were getting mean this year. There was a weird sort of mass hysteria sweeping the floor, where totally reasonable, rational people that I would normally enjoy having a chat with suddenly became consumed by the crazy-pants need to be at THE FRONT OF THE LINE RIGHT FUCKING NOW. Part of this may be due to the steady increase in toy scalpers, people who come to SDCC just to buy the exclusives and resell them on eBay at a hefty markup. Think I'm kidding? Look at eBay. The Monster High doll I bought for twenty dollars two weeks ago now has a base "buy it now" of sixty dollars...and people are paying it. The market has stabilized, and the people who bought as much as they could carry at the convention are reaping the benefits.

Because the scalpers were clearing things out as quickly as they could, the people who wanted those toys for their own collections acquired a new sense of urgency—suddenly, it wasn't "walk briskly," it was "run." And when the scalpers started running, too, "run" turned into "stampede."

Saturday, after being asked to pick up a Monster High doll for a friend, Amy and I went over to the Mattel booth to get in line. The line was...ugly. Basically, a single guard was doing crowd control at the mouth of the actual line, and letting people in one at a time, right to left. Amy and I were on the far left; four people literally shoved past us to get into the line before we could. Shoved past us. But we were there for girl toys (which always sell slower than boy toys), so we waited until we could get past the guard, and we got into the lineup without major incident.

About six people behind us in line (and thus right next to us, due to the amusement park ride setup being used for people moving) was a mother and her seven-year-old daughter. The daughter was pretty clearly upset. The daughter was also dressed as Draculaura, one of the major characters from Monster High. I asked what they were in the line for, and guessed that it might be Ghoulia. The little girl, still looking miserable, confirmed.

I asked her mother what was wrong.

"We've tried to get into this line four times," she replied.

Why so many tries? Because people were pushing her child. People were stepping on her child. So when the crowd was crazy, they had to withdraw—no doll is worth injuring a little kid, period. And the girl was, naturally, very concerned that she wouldn't be able to get her toy.

I asked the mother if they wanted to go ahead of me. She looked stunned. She asked, several times, if I was sure; Amy and I both affirmed that, if one of us was getting the last Monster High doll, we wanted it to be the little girl. (None of the six people between us and the kid were there for Monster High toys; like most collectors, they wanted the "boy toys," which always sell out before anything else.) We let the girl and her mother go ahead of us...and the mother's level of gratitude was so far out of proportion with the cost of the gesture that it made me want to go around yelling at people. Don't step on kids! Cheese and crackers, that's just common sense!

Most of the kids at SDCC are very well-behaved, possibly because they're too terrified by the size of the crowd to do anything else. It's pretty easy to believe that the bogeyman will get you if you're bad when you can see the bogeyman, he's right over there and he's buying comic books. Maybe he needs a snack! It could be you. So they're pretty cool, those con kids, the next generation of our species. I mean, unless someone in a giant Perry the Platypus costume has just walked by. There are limits.

And I'm not saying kids get everything. I didn't give the girl my toy, I just let her go ahead of me to get hers. But there are moments where you really need to pause and ask yourself "is my eBay profit worth stepping on this little girl?" And if the answer is ever "yes," maybe it's time for some serious soul searching.

Here's a goal for all of us who are planning to attend San Diego Comic Convention 2012: let's not be dicks. And when we're buying cool stuff, let's make sure we're buying it for ourselves or our friends, not for our burgeoning eBay business. Okay?

Cool.

Tags: cranky blonde is cranky, don't be dumb, post-con, toys are nice

cathschaffstump

August 3 2011, 16:22:03 UTC 5 years ago

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These are the reasons I no longer go to San Diego. I used to be a frequent flier, but when I had to crawl under a line to avoid being crushed after picking up tickets, that was enough. This was 2007.

Cath

Mass hysteria in smart people: toys aren't worth it.

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