I am Pavlov's dog.: seanan

I am Pavlov's dog.

Okay. So. If you made me make a list of my favorite movies of all time, the movies that make me stop when I flip past them on basic cable, the movies that I saw in the theater more than three times, both Resident Evil and Resident Evil: Apocalypse would be in the top ten. My cube at work is decorated in RE movie posters. I carry an Umbrella Corporation umbrella. For years, I basically lived in my zip-up S.T.A.R.S. sweatshirts, and only stopped because a) they died horrible, gruesome deaths and b) Hot Topic no longer carries them. At the same time, if you made me make a list of my most hated movies of all time, the movies I have tried to delete from my memory, Resident Evil: Extinction would also make the top ten. There are a lot of reasons for this. They comprise a rant that takes about twenty minutes to fully deliver. Suffice to say, in my world, it didn't happen. So...

Sunday, my housemate and I went to see Jonah Hex (I had promised him Toy Story 3, I couldn't deliver, he got to pick the replacement movie). I found it decent. It wasn't a waste of two hours of my life, and sometimes that and air conditioning are all I can ask from a summer movie. Anyway, as we settled into the all-encompassing seats of Barney-colored love with our popcorn and our drinks, the trailers started to roll. I love trailers. I am a simple soul in some regards.

Establishing shot: a dark intersection full of people. Very film noir, very black and white. Zoom in on a woman's high heeled shoes. Her blue and red piped high heeled shoes.

Her Umbrella Corporation-colored high heeled shoes.

I was sitting up in my seat, practically panting, even before the voice over started telling us exactly how the infection began. As the trailer went on, I got more and more excited, despite the fact that my brain was chanting "no no no no no" very, very loudly. The brain was not under consultation. The brain was not invited. By the end of the trailer, I was ready to run out, buy my tickets, and invest in a whole new assortment of Umbrella co-branded merchandise.

I have been subliminally conditioned into brand loyalty to the Umbrella Corporation.

Does anybody else see a problem with this?

la_marquise_de_

June 24 2010, 18:03:47 UTC 7 years ago

New comment

I'm the girl who watches hours of unsubtitled Chinese tv shows for intermittent glimpses of Yuen Biao. I buy Chinese sponge because he likes it. So, I see no problem, none whatsoever.

seanan_mcguire

June 25 2010, 17:19:49 UTC 7 years ago

Yay!

cupcakery

June 24 2010, 18:05:08 UTC 7 years ago

The Resident Evil film series always has the best trailers - I still love the fake facial/skin rejuvenation one.

June 25 2010, 17:20:15 UTC 7 years ago

Did you see that a real cosmetics company made a skin cream that looks JUST LIKE IT?

bkwrrm_tx

June 24 2010, 18:09:31 UTC 7 years ago

::squeeee::

x4

My daughters got me hooked on the Resident Evil movies, and I thoroughly enjoy them. Now I'll have to go to the movies, just for the trailer. *g*

BTW, I just finished A Local Habitation (after threatening my husband if he bothered me) and WOW. Just ... wow. Now I'm eagerly saving my pennies until October, so that I can get #3. :-)

June 25 2010, 17:20:24 UTC 7 years ago

tikiera

June 24 2010, 18:32:07 UTC 7 years ago

Haven't seen Extinction yet, now wondering if I should...

June 25 2010, 17:20:34 UTC 7 years ago

I...didn't like it at all.

spectralbovine

June 24 2010, 18:40:01 UTC 7 years ago

If my evil plan works out correctly, I will be watching the three RE movies the second week of July. And then I, too, will want Umbrella Corporation-colored high-heeled shoes.

Okay, that is highly unlikely.

June 25 2010, 17:20:43 UTC 7 years ago

Yes, but what an image.

Deleted comment

touch_of_ink

June 25 2010, 03:46:04 UTC 7 years ago

Keep an eye out at Hot Topic. I remember just writing a purchase order for Green Lantern Hoodies in extended sizes up to 3 or 4x. There wasn't a picture, so I don't know if it's the same one or not.

7 years ago

wiredwizard

June 24 2010, 19:26:53 UTC 7 years ago

Damn... I'd have loved to get the movie posters for RE...

June 25 2010, 17:21:27 UTC 7 years ago

The UK RE2 posters were the best.

tygerversionx

June 24 2010, 19:35:00 UTC 7 years ago

After being scared of all horror/thriller movies when I was a kid, I was finally pulled into liking SOME zombie movies BECAUSE of the RE movies. I was all "okay, scary moments, but action-oriented enough with kick-ass characters that I'll survive them."

I twig out whenever I hear the TERM "umbrella corporation." And since it's generally involved in some kind of health care thing ... I always think to myself "You really DON'T want your health care from them, people...!" Even though I know it's silly for me to think that.

June 25 2010, 18:36:59 UTC 7 years ago

YES. Every time I hear that, I cringe a little.

yorick28

June 24 2010, 19:41:47 UTC 7 years ago

I have nothing intelligent to add to the conversation; I just felt compelled to share this picture after seeing your tags for this entry:

bearhand

June 24 2010, 22:39:04 UTC 7 years ago

I just spit diet coke out of my nose you bastard.

vincentursus

aliciaaudrey

June 24 2010, 19:42:39 UTC 7 years ago

These things happen. There there. Have a cookie. A cookie shaped like an UMBRELLA. It's not infected. Probably.

I made my boyfriend (now my husband) play all of Resident Evil 4 for me.

This despite the fact that survival horror is a genre of game I generally speaking have no interest in (not the last of which is because I can't play them. I mean, I really can't. I have a terrible sense of direction. Any game that requires me to free roam without a sufficient HUD display to tell me where the frak I am (and preferably a mini map in the corner) and where the devil I'm supposed to go will end in me running repeatedly into SAME WALL.)

I have a lot of patience for watching other people play video games. This was family time in my house growing up (I'm probably one of the oldest second generation gamers: my parents were in their mid-twenties when Nintendo started to get big and they had an Atari before that). So I laid down to watch him play and then I HAD TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.

So I made him beat it in a weekend because I was leaving (we lived several states apart at the time.) And I HAD TO SEE THE ENDING.

Hubby: "You do realize this is a very silly game, right?...I mean, fun. But very silly."

Me: "Shut up and figure out how to kill Little Person Napoleon already." (this has to be one of the more demented examples of Video Game Villainy ever)

Hubby: "Did somebody replace you with a plagas zombie?"

Me: "Have you tried using the flame thrower yet?"

Hubby: "I don't think I have a flame thrower."

Me: "See, now, there's your problem."

(he did beat it. Thankfully for my peace of mind.)

June 25 2010, 18:39:15 UTC 7 years ago

I do the same thing! I'm no good at playing those games, but oh, how I do love to watch them.

dena

fatherofdragons

June 24 2010, 20:27:36 UTC 7 years ago

That's unfortunate. I mean, at least in the movies, the executives running Umbrella Corp are generally dumber than a sack of hammers (let's kill the only guy who really understands the T-Virus because he resents being shoved around at gunpoint!). It makes me suspect that any Umbrella Corps products are likely to kill or mutate you in unpleasant ways, unless that's what they're supposed to do.

June 25 2010, 18:39:35 UTC 7 years ago

Heh. Sadly true.

martianmooncrab

June 24 2010, 20:40:03 UTC 7 years ago

following the thread, Umbrella Corp products mutate... so what would the shoes turn into? or turn you into?

dornbeast

June 24 2010, 21:40:32 UTC 7 years ago

One possibility is that the shoes adapt to your feet. Do you have foot problems? You'd never know, the way these high heels fit.

Another possibility is that they adapt to your situation. Trying to run away from the zombies? You aren't in high heels now, you're in running shoes.

saffronrose

June 24 2010, 21:23:27 UTC 7 years ago

No, no problem at all, even if I don't have a similar compulsion with clothes like that. I have it with other things, certain food ingredients, names of things, and so on.

June 25 2010, 18:40:04 UTC 7 years ago

Yay, brainwashing!

dormantdrake

June 24 2010, 21:40:16 UTC 7 years ago

I see no problem with brand loyalty to the Umbrella Corporation...

...have you seen the tins of mints?

June 25 2010, 18:40:12 UTC 7 years ago

I have.

SO COOL.

June 24 2010, 21:41:09 UTC 7 years ago

The only problem I can think of is finding the products.

fionn320

June 25 2010, 02:41:17 UTC 7 years ago

http://www.thinkgeek.com/caffeine/wacky-edibles/d21e/

celticdragonfly

June 25 2010, 12:32:23 UTC 7 years ago

Having sorted through the comments enough to more or less figure out what you were talking about, I went to google to find this trailer.

I can find one "teaser trailer" but it is clearly not the one you are talking about.

No, wait, was looking up the wrong movie in the chain. Okay. Um. Still can't find it.

Curious.

June 25 2010, 18:40:46 UTC 7 years ago

Huh.

Maybe it's not online yet?

markbernstein

June 25 2010, 12:57:41 UTC 7 years ago

Speaking of attracting loyal customers:

June 25 2010, 18:42:34 UTC 7 years ago

HEE!

June 25 2010, 18:42:46 UTC 7 years ago

Ditto. 3-D hurts my head.

phantomdancer

June 25 2010, 15:59:22 UTC 7 years ago

I just want to see you wearing those shoes...

June 25 2010, 18:42:57 UTC 7 years ago

I'll make a note of that.

marsdejahthoris

June 25 2010, 16:34:36 UTC 7 years ago

I have an RPD shirt from Hot Topic. It's part of my emergency Halloween Costume. Add grey makeup and black eyeshadow, and you're a zombie!

I wore it on the plane once while flying down to visit a friend, and the lady sitting next to me asked how long I'd been a cop.

June 25 2010, 18:43:06 UTC 7 years ago

I, too, have this shirt!

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