Seanan McGuire (seanan_mcguire) wrote,
Seanan McGuire
seanan_mcguire
  • Mood: cranky
  • Music: Glee, "Bust A Move."

I'm a professional, I swear,

I am a professional. I am aware of what is and is not appropriate conversation for polite company (although I sometimes forget when the topics of "pandemic disease" or "zombies" come up; sadly, I can be goaded into gleeful explanations of latency and droplet-based transmission just about anywhere, including the dinner table). I wear real grown-up shoes when I have to take business meetings, and I have a calm, measured telephone voice.

All this being said, there's a reason I don't usually take phone calls in my house.

The Agent called to discuss my upcoming trip to New York, during which we're going to be doing several dinner-type things, some meeting-type things, and a lot of hanging out. During our forty-minute or so discussion, she was treated to...

"Ow! Ow ow OW! Goddammit, Alice, get your claws out of my fucking leg!"
"No. No, you can't have that. No, that isn't yours. No."
"Get off of there! Jesus, cat, I swear, I will skin you."
"I can get new cats, you know. Better cats. Smaller cats. Cats that don't do that."
"Alice, give back my bra."
"I'm serious, Alice. Give me back my damn bra."
"THAT'S MY FUCKING BRA, CAT!"
"Okay, I give up. Just do whatever the fuck you want."

...all while we were having a serious business discussion. I swear, the fact that she hasn't drowned me and put me out of her misery is something of a miracle.
Tags: alice, cats, cranky blonde is cranky, personal superhero
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  • 89 comments
...go 1 level up... Expand

seanan_mcguire

November 6 2009, 18:41:02 UTC 7 years ago

...all of these things are TOTALLY APPROPRIATE conversation and you should come over here and talk about them RIGHT NOW.

scholarinexile

November 6 2009, 18:59:23 UTC 7 years ago Edited:  November 6 2009, 18:59:42 UTC

See, you understand! These days, if I start going on about adipocere or frame-shift mutations during dinner, and half my friends put down their forks and give me that Look. This from the same crowd of people who were a moment before discussion their bloody battle with a plague doctor in our D&D campaign from the night before (and yes, I've made plague doctors a primary villain in my D&D campaigns, where the current story arc involves an effort to control the spread of a sentient plague. You can make a guest appearance any time you like). I'll be more than happy to discuss such grotesqueries with you at any time you like, hon. It occurs to me that some time I should arrange to be in the same geographic locality as you.

shiyiya

November 9 2009, 07:56:12 UTC 7 years ago

This sounds fascinating. I need friends like you people :P